Filthie's Mobile Fortress Of Solitude

Filthie's Mobile Fortress Of Solitude
Where Great Intelligence Goes To Be Insulted

Monday, 5 October 2015

Canadian Politics 101

Up here in Canada we are headed into elections - and like our Yank friends down south the choices we have to make range from mediocre to absolutely ghastly. Perhaps I exaggerate when I use the term "choices".

For the hell of it is this: there IS no choice. If you have a pulse, a triple digit IQ and work for a living trying to support a family...this is your choice:

Stephen Harper: Fat Old White Guy With Enemies At The Gates

Ol' Steve is the best of a bad lot. Steve himself is a plain spoken, likeable fella who is on the side of middle class Canadians and their families. He understands that people largely have to do for themselves, that the bills have to be paid largely by those that incurred them, and that you can't spend more than you earn without running into problems. He also seems intent on keeping the gubbermint OUT of socially engineering our culture. He is a troubled politician with baggage, though, as scandal is creeping into his reign. The Mike Duffy and Pamela Wallin affairs left him with some chit on his face, and there may (or may not be) a boondoggle swirling around the nation's procurement of the new F35 fighter jets. He is the arch enemy of the welfare class, the do-gooders and the social justice warriors that figure gay marriage, environmentalism, and cradle to grave welfare are Canada's top priorities.

Which brings us to the next....ahem...."candidate" for leadership of Canada.

Favourite of the hairy chested feminists, the gay hipsters of Tranna & Montreal: Turdo La Doo!!!
Isn't he a dreamboat? Look at that hair! I wonder what kind of curling iron he uses?
He wants to grow the economy "from the heart outwards...."

Justin Trudeau is running on his name. His father, Pierre Elliot Trudeau was the prime minister of Canada back in the 70's and early 80's. Unfortunately nobody told the liberals that 2/3's of the nation hated the man's guts. Justin is an idiot that outside politics - makes a living off of his Daddy's trust fund and a part time job as a substitute teacher (drama, if I'm not mistaken). But to the fat elderly liberal ladies with bad haircuts, the vibrant imported third world toilet scrubbers and janitors, the urban cliff dwellers and gay hipsters of Tranna...he's a rock star!!! A recent photo op of him went terribly wrong when he went into Tim Horton's to commiserate with the minimum wage earners working there. At the time he was wearing a watch that costs more than your average coffee slinger makes in a year! Ooops. But rest assured, Turdo La Doo feels your pain, minimum wage earners!!! Of course, once in power it is YOUR wealth that he intends to 'redistribute' - much the same way his father shafted the lower class that voted for him. Poverty and stupidity are close friends, and it is obvious that this whoreson fully intends to exploit them for personal gain. He may very well succeed.

No! Call off security! Don't throw him out! He's NOT a vagrant!!!
Tommie The Commie Putting On His Game Face

I am thankful for Tom Mulcaire. If nothing else, this idiot splits the vote on the political left. He is the favourite of selfish seniors that figure the nation owes them a living and are entirely comfortable with the idea of bankrupting their kids and grandkids to do it. He is the pick of the union slob, the snivel servant, and the sleazy teacher's unions who make no secret of their intention to bankrupt future generations, and are quite comfortable using children as hostages in their wage negotiations. Like Turdo La Doo this beardo is an economic genius: he's refinanced his own home 11 times. That at least 1/3 of Canadians have no problem with this is an embarrassment to the intelligence of the Canadian electorate. He fully expects us to hand him the keys to the national treasury too. If he gets elected (and he well may), Canada WIILL get the gubbermint it deserves - good and hard!

I was a young man when Turdo La Doo's father was running Canada into the ground. When I hit the job market in the early 80's, Alberta was in deep recession. The liberal feds had taxed the oilpatch into penury, and what was a recession for the adults back then - was an absolute depression for us kids. Youth unemployment was around 25~35%. I remember watching the economic fall setting in too: new buildings were going up everywhere and selling at top dollar; people were buying big houses they couldn't afford; everyone had snazzy cars and trucks because the good times would never end. I remember as a kid watching that lunacy - and wondering if the adults knew something I didn't...and then the layoffs started. Then the houses and F350's went up for sale. Then people who had lost everything skipped on their loans and mortgages. Property values dived. Employment rates dived. Taxes sky rocketed. For the next 15 years things pretty much sucked for everyone.

Today I am seeing the exact same signs. I fully expect to be unemployed this time next year and will be thankful if we are not reduced to soup kitchens, flop houses and riding around on the roofs of trains looking for work! Is it going to get that bad...? I dunno. But I can see that our economy in Alberta is basically a dead man walking - that doesn't really know it's dead yet. I survived one of these once...and sincerely hope I can do it again. Suffice it to say I am planning to rely on myself - and not some gov't of sleazy thieves to care for my well being.

I strongly advise you to do the same. Good luck, are going to need it!


I lost a few marks on this one due to the fact that I overlooked the beautiful Elizabeth May, dowager-empress of the enviro-MINT:

What can I say? She is entirely forgettable...
Like most Canadins I never gave this clucky woman the time of day. I suspect her role in the next election will be as a lightening rod for the many Canadians that are so fed up with the other three - they will vote for this dunce as a protest vote. For the sake of completeness and intellectual honesty I looked her up on Wiki:
May was born in Hartford, Connecticut,[4][5] the daughter of Stephanie (Middleton), a sculptor, pianist, and writer, and John Middleton May, an accountant.[6] Her father was born in New York and raised in England,[7] and her mother was also a native New Yorker. She has a younger brother named Geoffrey.[4][5] Her mother was a prominent anti-nuclear activist and her father was Assistant Vice President of Aetna Life and Casualty.[5][8]

Ah. Champagne socialist. Who woulda thunk it? She and Turdo La Doo have much in common. Thanks to BW who pointed out this oversight.

There are probably one or two other pikers hiding in the woodwork - but these are the biggest players at the moment.


  1. You have quite the sense of humour. I was having some fun and find you included Ms. May, an Green Party nut who recently admitted to being unable to ride a bicycle. Americans have nothing on Canadian politics.

    1. I probably shouldn't talk politics BW. But lord - from what I am seeing it is almost a three-way tie in the polls. I am not looking forward to what's coming...

    2. Post whatever you want, political or otherwise. It is your space after all. I do not post anything political as my site is not political. I might start a political site, the thought has come to mind. You can figure out where I stand from my blogroll.

      I am dreading Election Day myself. I am hoping Canadians will stay the course. Our current leader is a little too dedicated to incremental implementation of Conservatism. I would like to see something truly revolutionary like a flat tax however he is better than that alternatives.

      Unless you lived in Alberta during a certain time you would have no idea of what the National Energy Program was like. I was not far out of college program and in five weeks I had one interview which led to a job. There were massive oil and gas sector layoffs and it is not exaggerating to say that people lived in fear of never finding work. For these reasons I will never vote for the Liberal Party.

      I am guessing you are in the Edmonton area. I am in that part of Alberta fairly often.

    3. I agree! You should be able to do your taxes on the kitchen table with a $7.00 calculator from Staples and get it done in 5 minutes or less. Everyone should have to pay, no exceptions should be made, so that everyone has a stake in keeping things honest.

      During those dark years I had a shotgun marriage to my pregnant girlfriend. I had no degree at the time, and got by - by working as many as 4 part time jobs to pay the bills. I did alright, I saved up enough cash to put myself through school and get a better job later...but sheesh...things were tough.

      I think Harper understands realpolitik and as a result - he won't stand on principles if it will cost him votes...and that tends to drag him leftwards in my opinion. Like you - I regard him the least of the three evils. (Four if you count dizzy Lizzie...) :)