Filthie's Mobile Fortress Of Solitude

Filthie's Mobile Fortress Of Solitude
Where Great Intelligence Goes To Be Insulted

Thursday, 8 February 2018

Team Building

So, it's not just me. BW is offside too.

I have a theory about crap like this. If you've ever lived in and worked for Corporate Global  Megacorp North America as I have - you are all too familiar with crap like this. I've been through all that and more - I was at one 'sales conference' out east where we all had to play the STUPIDEST team building games that involved rubber chickens, beating each other with pool noodles, and other flub-dubbery that left me just gawping on the sidelines. I got in chit too: "Get in the game, Filthie!!!" I planted my butt and refused and replied, "I'm 38 years old, not 12...". But my coworkers got right into it and showed that great team spirit, by golly! Afterward it was drinks at the bar. I had one and went up to my hotel room. After I had left, those that stayed behind got drunk and got into a barn burner feud that had them drunkenly shouting at each other into the wee hours. The next morning I was sipping coffee while those embarrassed morons nursed hangovers. I call it 'tunnel vision'. Some people get so immersed and invested in their jobs - that nothing else matters except that job, and they are so emotionally invested in it that they will do anything for it. I've seen it bring out the worst in people more times than I can count.

I'm not sure of my ground here, feel free to correct me in the comments: but I think the theory is that people letting their hair down and acting silly around each other - is supposed to make them less inhibited and more likely to bond. This may or may not be coincidental, but my anecdotal experience has always been that it's women driving this crap - usually the fatties, chubsters and bints in HR. They get right off on it too.

The best team builder I ever met was Lesiure Suit Larry. He was always seemed to be in charge of any group he was part of. He was always cheerful and upbeat, and he understood that the purpose of the manager isn't to flog people and push them - it was to pull them. You could make any mistake in the world, and then take it in to Larry and he would either fix it himself or show you how to fix it. You could disagree with him as well - and he would most likely prove you wrong, explain why he was doing things the way he did - so that you could play your position on the team better as well. Once in awhile I caught him chitting the bed on something - and he would congratulate me on making a good catch. I still remember on certain Fridays he would come in at 3:00 in the afternoon and kick me out early. "The company looks after itself, Filthie - and we have to look after ourselves on occasion too! NYUK NYUK NYUK!" There were days I refused to go too because I had too many things to do or quotes to punch out. When you worked with Larry, you couldn't help but get in the game! We worked hard but we had fun too. Larry smoked like a stack, and had to go out back to indulge his filthy habit. His favourite stunt was to leave the doors open in summer 'to cool the place off'  - and all the local hornets and yellow jackets would come in and we would have 3 guys running around the office flapping and screaming for a few days. Anyone that got bit had to buy pop for the others at lunch time. Somehow we set sales records and became the preferred vendors for the big guys like Enbridge, NOVA Chemicals, Celanese, Imperial Oil - you name it. We must have been doing something right. We spent a lot of time entertaining guests that would drop into our little shop just to meet the us.

Right now I am between jobs and I just have no interest in The Corporation. The small family run businesses are no picnic, but I am not a sheep either.

Or an ant.


  1. Any company gathering I was at I stopped at one drink and left. Getting drunk in front of your co-workers quickly barbeques the image and reputation you tried to build for yourself. I had no desire to see my co-workers drunk or hang out with them in that state.

    I believe a workplace and be fun and informal and people can accomplish more when they are given leeway and can lean on each other.

    1. No doubt - and I sure as heck won't get plastered in close proximity to rivals, enemies, or the boss.

      Teams are built on the job by doing the job as a team and making it good for everyone - not stupid games or childish events. BTW, BW - I have read things about the United Way that have me scratching my head as to whether they are a charity - or something much, much worse. I don't like some of the accusations I've seen.

      But what do I know...?

    2. Sometimes a person can only give so much when it comes to charity. I have a couple of organizations I support and I stop there and decline everything else. Who I support I keep to myself because an act of charity is an act of giving and should not be an act of self promotion.

  2. Yeah, team building. Any manager who even suggests a team building exercise should be demoted until he learns how to be a good manager. He probably won't learn, but there you are.

    I used to work for a man like Larry, and it was a real pleasure. We're still friends to this day.

  3. the people who put on these events get paid!
    why management falls for it , i have no idea.
    the pool noodle follies are nothing as bad as some of the 'women's movement' garbage [a movement much similar to movements of the bowels during an ebola outbreak].
    the people invited to speak and demonstrate at these 'events' were paid huge $$$ for pure nothing.
    i agree that it is probably females somewhere who think these are great ideas.
    pbs had a 'special' yesterday, with the amanpour woman, about how to permanently change sexual culture.
    in other words, to stop men desiring women.
    thousands of years of desire and instinct shall be wiped put by pbs, amanpour, and lots of gassing.
    shows that genetics must be one of the 'social constructs' you hear so much about.