Canadianna: Turdo La Doo Assaulted By Terrorists And Foreign Actors

 

But it was a mostly peaceful assault dontchya know…

A Mostly Factual Snippet: Canadian Flyover Country

A hundred years ago Turdo The Elder decided to do a good ol’ fashioned train whistle stop tour where he’d ride the rails round the country kissing babies, shaking hands and schmoozing with the dirt people before the election. Trouble started almost immediately: people in Morontario started pelting the train with rocks, eggs and rotten vegetables.

The light pelting grew to a full blown food fusillade in Manitoba … and the train still had to get past Saskatchewan and Alberta. By the time the train made BC it smelled like a landfill… and still the people pelted it with whatever came to hand. An exasperated Peee-aire was at his wits end. In BC, he flipped the bird at beleaguered Canadians that were losing their jobs, their homes and families thanks to his idiotic economic policies. 

It was all over at that point. People met that train with bigger business like rocks and threw them with arms like cannons - fuelled by rage and frustration and hate. The train suffered tens of thousands of dollars in damage to the windows alone. Alienated westerners vowed to meet that train on its return trip with explosives and gunfire.

At the next town, under the cover of darkness, the fwench fag was secretly hustled off the train and onto the first available jet back east. When he got home he dropped all pretension about loving the Canadian people. He called us vile names and went down to defeat when voters had had enough of his guff and ignored the media slobs - and voted him out in favour of an equally useless conservative cuck.

The train was hidden at a rail yard off the beaten track and VIA Rail ran a media blitz emphasizing that P.E.T. was no longer on the train… and that there was no point in angry citizens attacking it anymore. A few days later the train cautiously limped into the Edmonton train yards, covered from stem to stern in rotten eggs, manure, yeeeccch and chunt. An army of $5.00/hour flunkies set upon it with putty knives, squeegees and buckets of degreasers, windex, Mr. Clean and other soaps and solvents. Legend has it that out in a forgotten corner of the Walker train yard, they’re still trying to scrape and scrub all the chit off that train.

After that… a disheveled and frightened spokesman for VIA Rail went on TV to say that never again would a politician be allowed to campaign from their trains.

*******

And of course, the media morons still don’t get it 20 years later. They’re totally useless and clueless. Trained international assassins don’t throw sand and gravel. They tend to prefer sniper rifles and bombs. Nor was this the work of eeeeeeeevil organized white supremist right wing/Christian hate groups. It was prolly done by a single mom, drowning in debt and trying to keep the kids fed and the lights on. Or some unemployed bum about to lose his house and job, family and self worth. It was an act of utter desperation and frustration from a conservative minded Canadian that wouldn’t be heard any other way. 

I think people are getting heartily sick of the double standards,

and that eventually this state of affairs will

come to an end.

It’s time to get the carnies and clowns out of our

politics.