Target Panic

Today was another good day at the bow bender’s club out in the country. I don’t get it…the baby dropped a massive deuce but it was no big deal because we have a dirt floor. I quickly picked up and bagged the land mine and retched at the smell. I then put it in the plastic garbage can but the funk filled the gigantic barn sized building. Then I cleaned up some other stuff and opened the garbage can again…and for some reason the plastic bag wasn’t containing the horrible stench! Like an ill wind… the invisible reek came billowing up out of that garbage can and I nearly keeled over. Heroically, with no regard to my own personal safety…I grabbed the bag and staggered out to the Dawgmobile and carefully put the bomb in the back of the truck. Friends…I say unto you that there are Marines and …sob…Texans that smell like roses compared to that little pupper. I think I got PTSD! Again! How does a knotted and sealed bag manage to stink like that?!?!

🤢🤮🤢

But…the glorious good news is that the ordeal may have finally dislodged a serious psychological problem I’ve had for years: target panic.

Target panic is something that afflicts almost every serious archer at some point in their recreational shooting careers. It can take years to resolve for some. It’s ruined promising archers since the game was invented. Here’s how it works: when the human body draws and anchors the bow for the shot, there’s a lot of mental and psychological gears turning throughout. During the aiming process the conscious mind seeks to align the sights with the target…and the subconscious mind reflexively prepares for a large explosive release of energy upon the arrow’s release. The body will “flinch” during the release and that in turn causes all kinds of other problems that destroy accuracy. Archers will ‘punch’ their release, they’ll fall out of form, they won’t follow through, they’ll move during and after the release - and all of this precipitates a blown shot. It happens in milliseconds and controlling it is crucial to a good shot. When it becomes entrenched…the hapless archer gets even more frustrated as he tries to cope with it…and that in turn leads to even more inaccuracies. Which causes more frustration and mental issues. 

For me it was infuriating and manifested itself with chronically undershooting my target. During the aiming process my sights often would sink below the target and raising them back up was a nightmare, the bow would seem to weigh a thousand pounds and my mind refused to raise it. It’s the damnedest thing that has been dogging me for years.

Today, after having my nasal passages and sinuses cleared out…I found myself able to shoot again. My trigger finger disaccoiated itself from my eyes, allowing me a close to perfect trigger squeeze. The bow was able to fire itself, free of any induced human error. Doing this is a mental trick like rubbing your tummy and patting your head at the same time…just more difficult. Once you master that…you will be able to compete. 

The classic archery course of fire is 30 arrows at 20 yards, at a standard bullface like the one above. Bullseye is 10, with a perfect score of 300. Most determined shooters will get into the 270 range scores with some serious practice and decent equipment. The men are separated from the boys in the 280s. In the 290s…you are looking at the true marksmen, often shooting advanced target rigs with low draw weights and optical sights. For a piker like me…280s are damned fine scores. Today we got a 276. Not bad…nothing to brag about…but nothing to really complain about either. 

I owe my good score and straight arrows to my Maker… or to an incredibly rank little bag of dogshite…!  A miracle? Worked through a little dog and a bag of crap? It would be proof that God loves His retards and their rude jokes, and it makes me smile to think of things that way.

Thanks for stopping in and hearing me prattle! Have a great Humpday!