Filthie's Mobile Fortress Of Solitude

Filthie's Mobile Fortress Of Solitude
Where Great Intelligence Goes To Be Insulted

Friday, 10 March 2017

Your SMV Test Results Are Back, Boys

No, not STD results, you morons, SMV - which stands for Sexual Market Value. In other words we all find out what we're worth to the ladies in terms of our manliness! Don't any of you retards read the manosphere? Of course, I'm not shocked at the results myself, but some of you may be. This data comes from the internet's biggest fag and gamma male - Vox Day. I suspect this may be one of those 'stopped clocks being right twice a day' scenarios.

In any event Amazon lists the most popular heroes and themes for romance novels that women like to read:

Soooooo - let's just see how the local blogging celebs stack up on that list, shall we?

Alpha Males: Wirecutter? World Famous Author & Adventurer WL Emery? Who woulda thunk it?
BBW: Big Beautiful Women? (Don't anyone say anything about this one if ya like breathing)
BIKERS: BW Bandy, Glenfilthie (I don't think anybody's surprised by this).
Cowboys: I don't think we have any of those here
Criminals And Outlaws: Gorges Grouse, Mad Jack, Pete Forester, possibly Quartermain
Doctors: I think Borepatch has a doctorate in ... something. He's a smart bugger anyways
Firefighters: Fire fighters, idiots. Most of us are firebugs and pyros...
Highlanders: Toirt....Turtle.... Turdie... Dammit, that boy from The Forty-Five blog. TB!
Pirates: N/A
Royalty & Aristocrats: King Charlie of Coopville. (Not bad for a chicken).
Spies: My Russian fans can fuggoff! I AM CANADIAN. Go hack the Americans! Sheeesh!
Vikings: Same as BBW above. Mind your tongue boys, and we'll all live through this.
Wealthy: HA! HAR HAR HAR!!! In your FACE, Uncle Bob! You're LAST on the list!!!   :) :)

I gotta think about the themes we would most likely find ourselves embroiled in. Senility is not on the list for some reason, but I think most of us could slip in under the wire for 'Amnesia' right? I'm sure we all have had the issues with leaving the terlet seat up, forgetting to replace the TP. 'Medical' and possibly 'Workplace' will encompass the rest of us.

So? The way I look at it we all did pretty good! It's been a quiet, cold, but steady 5 days up in Alberta's oilsands, and I am going home today. So now, if you'll excuse me, I am gonna clean up my hotel room, pack, and take CW's open road home!

If it makes ya feel any better - CW didn't make that list either.  ;) Have a good Friday.

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