Filthie's Mobile Fortress Of Solitude

Filthie's Mobile Fortress Of Solitude
Where Great Intelligence Goes To Be Insulted

Tuesday, 13 November 2018

Dream ANALysis

I have most of the textbook tells of the average mope with severe psychological problems. The one I get the most often is the one where I am back in school, watching the insane procession of greek letters and characters (that infest process control theory and higher mathematics) march across the whiteboard in a meaningless, lunatic scrawl - and I understand none of it. Not one jot. The midterms are tomorrow, and I know I will fail. I understand that others have had experience with that one too.

But sometimes an echoing fart comes bubbling up out of my subconscious, of such a magnitude and stench that even I am dumbfounded at the scope of it.

This morning I couldn't wake up. The wife's cell provides the alarm function in our day, and tinkles a classic Japanese tune to start our day. I woke up just fine and was going to get up... and then just lost all ambition. Somehow I fell back deeply asleep!

I dreamed that I was asleep (I dunno how that works) - in camp. Instead of my fart sack though, I had blankets. I was surprised to be in a bed of sorts, out camping under tarps and stars. I threw back the covers and discovered that I had shat the bed!

I had flipped back the covers and there it was - a great, big fat smelly Texan the size of an NFL football! All I could do was look at it. Then I heard the boys nearby - knocking about and collecting their gear together for the day's hunting. If they came by and saw that, I would be the butt of rude jokes from here to eternity!!!

And then I woke up. Thankfully there were no Texans in bed with me. The wife was stomping around knocking and banging the way she does when she wants me to wake up.

I'm sure it's nothing serious - I'll take this matter up with a qualified professional like Jack or WL and be right as rain again in no time. Feel free to leave your expert opinion in the comments if you're so inclined. I probly just need more fibre in my diet or something!

Hope y'all had a great weekend - and may your problems this Monday morn be small and insignificant - like mine!


7 comments:

  1. Oddly enough, I had a dream where I was forced to do my business in what appeared as a public area, while strangers walked by trying to not seem to be looking. It was embarrassing, and I was suffering from the urge, with no results.

    I woke, with the gurgling, soon to be a crises feeling, and quickly ran to the can, with the thought of how thankful I was for not completing my transaction while sleeping.

    I blame my dream on a bad attitude, and spicy chicken. I had both last night, and bourbon probably helped more than my attitude.

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  2. You're either afraid that a a hidden weakness or a mistake you made will be exposed...

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    1. It has the ring of truth Pete. Be damned if I know what that is - I am one of those guys that is pretty good at lying to himself when ego is on the table...

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    2. Comes down to it, you are what you are, and you ain't what you ain't, Glen. Get comfortable with that, and the rest kinda falls into place... And you'll probably stop dreaming about waking up with Texans...

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  3. Glen, here's a dream interpretation websites if you are so inclined:

    http://www.dreammoods.com/dreamdictionary/

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    1. Thanks for that TB. It is my scholarly conviction that if you consider what The Usual Suspects did to climate science- it pales in comparison to what they did to psychiatry and psychology... I will check it out...

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  4. What have you been taking as far as prescription drugs go? Because this has all the earmarks of a morphine dream.

    Unless your dreams are prophetic (mine are not, but I have an Aunt who has them periodically), I suggest you stop sweating the small stuff. At the end of the year, it'll all shake out okay.

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