Filthie's Mobile Fortress Of Solitude

Filthie's Mobile Fortress Of Solitude
Where Great Intelligence Goes To Be Insulted

Friday, 5 July 2019

Mort's Bare Bum: Pic!

Last time I went down to the dawg barber shop I caught the very hell of it! Mort and Macey were going in - her for a much needed spring trim and a bath in the beauty parlour - and Mort for a manly shave and a shower. I like to pig-shave him in the summer because his natural hair is too much and he gets hot and manky and smelly.

"Bliiiiiiihhhhh!!!!" the stylist wailed, "You can't pig shave him Mr. Filthie! He will look as ugly as you do with a hair cut like that!!!". I hakked and sputtered and barely suppressed my rage - I could have said something about that impudent bint's weight, but fortunately for her I was too craven gentlemanly and chivalrous to respond in such a petty manner.

"Bic him, Danno!" I ordered.

And of course he came out of the barbershop looking smart and handsome just like me - but he didn't seem to see it that way. With all his hair shaved off, he was pink as me underneath all that matting. And without any hair - he has an almost human like bum like me too - big hairy meat curtains that would make a plumber wretch. (You sissies would probaly get PTSD if you saw them). Mort gets all mopey and melancholy without his hair, but I tell him he looks like a star and after I beat him up a bit he can be joshed back into his usual good humour.

Today on Dawg Patrol I noticed that his hair isn't growing back the way it usually does. It's weird; the rest of his body hair is growing back but his bum is coming in much slower.

It's always something with Mort. He just can't seem to stay out of trouble!
At this rate his ass will be frozen solid
by December!

And what is with all that black hair? He always used to be white and brown. I wonder if old dawgs get like old farts and start losing their hair? Goof!!!

You can barely see them: this year's crop of goslings are almost full
grown adolescents now - hope 
you boys are sharp on the 12 bores this year. They seriously need to be
thinned out a bit.
Time flies like a blur.

Another boring Friday comes and goes past Castello Di La Filthie - and not one 'f' was given by any concerned!

Jeez I hope one of you has something fun lined up for the weekend! All we got going for us here is watching Mort's arse hair grow. 

Have a great Friday night and try and stay out of trouble!  :)

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