I've been inexplicably bummed out lately. Involuntary/temporary retirement and/or semi-retirement has its challenges. For the first few months I was okay but now that all my reloading and fun stuff is caught up, I am looking for my RNR in stuff like housework!
I am still looking for work though, but the job boards have fallen right off. Alberta is now going head first into the shitter. Decent jobs are almost non-existent on the boards, and the official unemployment stats have us in the double digits for the first time in decades. I personally believe they are at least twice the reported number based on what I see during the day. A lot of houses are going up for sale now, as owners get bogged down in mortgages they can no longer afford. If the pattern holds the foreclosures and mass layoffs are about a year away. Traffic during the day is greatly reduced, most of it is elderly grey hairs that are going about their retirement errands.
I started slipping back into my old ways and have picked up some weight. FFS - I am smarter than this. I am going back on the rabbit food and will lose weight and start exercising even if it kills me. I'm angry now. The old ego is taking a self inflicted beating and it's damned hard to shake it off.
Like a lot of people I am trying to get my head around a minimalist lifestyle. It's not bad but...we've done it before. But the hell of that is... I don't need or want any more stuff. Even if I had unlimited funds, without a job it feels like something is missing. I have too much as it is. I need to find new ways to entertain and engage myself. My in laws had a huge problem with that when they retired. In their case, they got so bored and didn't know what to do with themselves - that they started involving themselves with our affairs to entertain and occupy themselves. Good lord, I still remember the fights that started. It ended poorly too.
I have the midwinter blahs. It's 3:30 as I write this and the sun is starting to set. Coupled with the unemployment - it's hard on the psych. My wife is still working and that really gets me. I am something of a traditionalist and it sticks in my craw that I am home cleaning house while she is out earning a buck. But this is the current year; and I am the wrong age, wrong gender, and wrong race for the majority of employers out there. I know all this in my head, but in my gut it still feels wrong. I wish I was the one taking off for work in the morning, and that I could leave my wife at home instead. I am starting to get cabin fever already and spring is still half a year away.
It's going to start getting cold for real soon, and the rifle range will be mostly uninhabitable... so I am looking at getting a membership at an indoor archery range so that I can at least get out of the house and polish up my lagging marksmanship. It's the damnedest thing - improving your archery technique will carry over to your rifles. I dunno why that is, it just is.
The shortest day of the year is only a couple weeks out - so we will be over the hump soon. I just hope my sanity holds up, HAR HAR HAR!!!!
You hang in there - and I will try to do the same! Have a great Wednesday.