Filthie's Mobile Fortress Of Solitude

Filthie's Mobile Fortress Of Solitude
Where Great Intelligence Goes To Be Insulted

Friday, 31 January 2020

Temporal Musical Murder Inc.

His name was Rico
He was a beaner,
Gabba gabba weebeejabba, yadda yadda yadda yaaaahhhh...

Oh! Good morning everyone! Thank you so much for taking the time to drop in on us - we're so glad to have you here!!!  No doubt, when you decided to drop into Uncle Bob's Advanced Heavy Particle Physics Lab & Lower Primate Studies Enclosure - you expected to see serious science and lab coats  going on … and not Yours Truly dancing around in a snow white polyester leisure suit and a white panama hat! Please forgive me! Didn't mean to shock anyone!

What is happening here, is that Dr. Victor Quartermain has invented a Time Machine, and we figured we'd test it by going back to the 1970's and murdering various a-holes and turdies that severely needed it, and thereby restoring some degree of sanity and respectability to current times. I will dress up in period-correct attire, and go back to murder the culprits before they ever become a problem! After the deed I will escape back into the future! We live in wonderous times! 🙂👍

After some very sophisticated calculations and careful considerations and deliberations - we came up with our first hit victim candidate:

I'll have to put some spit and polish on my boogie...
I'll have to dance my way into pistol range!
Don't any a you try this at home!!!

Wish us luck, everyone! If we do our jobs right disco, white underwear for men, and the entire Trudeau family will disappear as if they never existed! All kinds of ass hattery will simply cease to exist!

Once we get good at this, we just might automate the process and make machines to take care of it. Not to blow my own horn, but the bulk of heavy lifting has already been done, thanks to my exemplary work with crapcopter drones. Ain't science wonderful?!?!?

Pasta le visa, arseholes!!!!

Errrrr…. looks like I am going to have to
clean up the 1980's too...
That's gonna require a whole nuther wardrobe...

Friday Apathy

I must be going through the winter “blah’s”. I read stuff on the internet that should lift my safeties and have me blowing super-heated steam out my ears ... and all I can do is chuckle. That, or I simply don't give a shit.

Half the world is gobbling in hysterical fright about coronavirus... and what does my gubbimint do? “Well!!! Huff! Puff! There’s a whole bunch of Canadians stranded in the area where the outbreak began, and we gotta bring them home!!!” And (of course), most of them aren't Canadians, they are fuggin chinks! Or 'dual citizens'. That’s right, bring a plane load of infected gooks into your country, guys! Nobody will dare doubt your virtue then! Because of the way the virus works there’s no way to make sure they’re clean... but we have accept that they are or we’re all racists.😆👍 Or homo/trans/goat-O-phobes….

Whatever. The spin doctors and dirty launderers of the innernet are working at full blast to make sure I am properly informed, and not duped by fake news, poop filled partisan propaganda, and misdirection ~

GAH! I need my eyes washed out
now too...🤮

Funny how it is that it’s always me that has been brainwashed. I have been so conditioned by evil white patriarchs, or shadowy cabals of super powerful magic Jews, or Donald Trump... that I can’t even appreciate true beauty when I see it.

I am so demented and brainwashed that I like icky guns. Been programmed and indoctrinated, dontchya know. Guns n' bibles, as some gay mullato once said... Sure, everyone knows that historically, govts that disarmed their citizens usually went on to mass murder them... but that could never happen here, right? Our govt’s would never allow that!!! We know we can trust them to always act for the greater good!!!

Did any a you guys catch that flap about that dunce that made a candle 'that smells like her vagina'? Or did I imagine that one whilst in a drunken stupor? I dunno what the cool kids made of it, but I did see some nauseating memery going on about it. I wonder if my apathy is tied to my advancing age? A lot of old folks reach that point where they'd rather remain ignorant than get off their arses to find out what is actually going on. I saw it all and let it blow by... I just didn't want to know.

That's the problem with these passing popular 'trends' though. You can put in an honest effort and knock yourself out trying to wrap your head around most of this kind of crap floating around on the internet... and the joke's on you when there's nothing there. It's like that impeachment debacle going on right now.

I am no legal expert but I'm positive that there are laws on the books about false accusations. Shouldn't those American Donks be up on charges of some sort?  Any one of you fellas can be accused of rape or harassment and be proven to be totally innocent - but the perps that formally accused you in court... don't even get a slap on the wrist. Even after they've grandstanded for the media and the Twitterati and Ignoratti and are the centre of public attention for their 15 seconds.

I can't help it. It used to be that these antics outraged and infuriated me. Then they started to make me laugh. Then it made me introspective - it's like falling face first into the mud - it's always funny when it happens to somebody else. I think my stance on the internet witch hunts, doxing, and virtue signalling is this: if ya play stupid games with stupid people - yer gonna win stupid prizes... so maybe it's best if you try to look scarce when the game is on.

Screw it. The wife has the day off and we are going to go outside and see if the real world still exists. I hereby abdicate my throne of the dark innertubes to whoever wants it. For now - I have better things to do.

Have a great Friday and thanks for stopping in.

Wednesday, 29 January 2020


This one’s going around the internet and boy, is it ever ruffling feathers.

I wouldn’t, if I were you...

That humour largely escaped me. Is it just me, or was that actually funny enough to double someone over and make them lose it? As humour goes, and politics aside - it merits a slight smirk at best. The laughter seemed hollow and forced too.

To my mind, the best comedians are not forced - their manner is light and easy. The best are the ones that can deliver their punchlines with a straight face. Larry delights in this regard, and remains one of my all time favourites. Let me start your Hump Day off with some easy humour that may even solicit a chuckle.

Ya won't see talent like that working on CNN...

Have a great Wednesday.

Monday, 27 January 2020


Ol' Harrison's getting a little rough around the edges as the years go on.
Time is not kind.
Sucks to be him I guess.

Apes. Together. STRONG!
Still a couple a hot young guns! I did a selfie!!


I stole this one from TB. All too often he lifts the lid on my cranium, takes a semantic dump... and it takes me a couple days to flush it. I am still chewing on this one. It may be mincing words, but I see it all the time - demented poltroons and clowns singing the praises of peace and pacifism and producing weaklings and degenerates ... and that very much is a harmful thing. Our kids don't know what gender they are and think they live in a fascist country. Morons are not always born - they can be made too.

Consider the great empires: every single one of them existed because they'd march into a territory, and force the locals to play ball, on the same field with the same rules as everyone else in their empire... or else. Like it or not, America has an empire. And just like America is the best country ever built by man (shaddup, it IS, because if it weren't, you wouldn't see every second and third world mudflap risking his life and family to get there) - the American Empire is the best empire that was ever forged by man. Just ask the Africans that are snuggling up to their new best friends, the Chinese. The empire isn't perfect, it has many flaws and failures as its detractors endlessly point out... but how many previous empires actually sent charitable wealth OUT to its vassals, protectorates, and spheres of influence? I only know of one.

Clueless liberals and lefties whine about wars being fought over money and power... but the truth is that ALL wars are about money and power, and yes, it DOES matter who controls it. I've heard it argued that the war in the Pacific was actually a contest for who would control the markets in the Pacific Rim. While it may be a sound premise, it has given rise to all kinds of revisionist history and conspiracy theory that stupid people get bogged down in. The fact is, if you were Korean, or Chinese, or one of the island dwellers... Imperial Japan was bad news and no bones about it. It boggles me today - the Japanese murdered more civilians for sport and mass murdered countless more than Nazi Germany ever did ... and half a century  later, that jug eared black baboon, Barkie Obutthole ... is bowing to them and apologizing. The mind wobbles. But... that is how the human animal rolls, I suppose, and some wobble as they roll more than others.

For now at least, we need to be peaceful men... but the time is drawing near when that won't work. When this empire falls... we will all be on our own, and there are no guarantees that the next empire to establish itself will be any better.

Chances are... it will probably be a great deal worse.

Have a great Monday, y'all. Any help on the cranial toilet plunger will be gratefully received in the comments.


Sunday, 26 January 2020

Teachers And Students

1. Never trust a fart.
2. Never pass a urinal without using it.
3. Never ignore a hard on.

A Break From Winter

Yesterday Macey went in for a check up and she’s doing fine for a 98 year old. She even got in and out of the Dawgmobile all by herself a couple times. 

On the way home, some senior delinquent and his evil border collie invaded our dawg park, so we went in to quell the rebellion. The border collie was young, rambunctious and fast and the hoopleheads had a ball chasing him. Eventually he settled down to play with us.

The skies were clear, blue and beautiful and temps are balmy. We’re getting a muchly appreciated break from winter for now.

Friday, 24 January 2020

Filthie’s Funnies

I dunno if that is better or worse than stepping 
in the freshies...

This never happens to me when I want it too. 
I'd just LOVE to chit my pants when I am giving Pete or Quartermain a lift...
but it only seems to happen when the cute girls are around.
Life is unfair.

Looks like Jack's work...
He is truly a chit house philosopher king...

Yannow, there's a time that comes when everyone just
gets too old and stupid to do the job. It's alright... unless you refuse to shuffle off
to that retirement pasture like the Donks do.
Bernie has had a stroke, Pelosi is senile and soaked in gin, Biden forgets where
he is and prattles, and the fake
indian vapour locks at the slightest dissent or disagreement.
They should be playing cards down at the senior's centre.
This impeachment bullshit is just a senior's hissy fit...!!!

Don't ask me how I know this...

… and a trust fund bequeathed by a rich uncle to
pay for the ammo! No way am I reloading for that one...

That, combined with a complete ban on the manufacture of
white underwear for men, would
save us all a LOT of grief.
Don't give me any crap about your rights, the Constitution and freedoms neither!
It's for the women and children
dontchya know.

Suck it up and get the Ka-Bar out.
The wife'll never miss it. Trust me on this one.

This is why I always like to drop in on Jack and Big Mike.
They know how to treat visiting VIP's
Like Yours Truly...
Think I'll steal that lighter when they aren't looking...

Have a great Saturday y'all. Party's at Jack's tonight...


Saturday Farts N’ Crafts: Stolen Honour

It's a hat band!
An emergency supply of paracord and arsewipe - 
at your beck and call, right on your head!

That's my favourite hat right there. I think I paid ten bucks for it at Mark's Work Wearhouse. There's probly 20 bucks of paracord on it now with that hand made hat band - made by a local hare lipped retard artiste! Yours Truly!!! The idea was that I'd have a handy supply of cordage right on my hat... but I had to get the wife to nail it down to keep it in place. I suppose I could cut a few threads off and use it in an emergency - that braiding and knot work comes apart with one yank and it falls into three separate cords that you could use to run a ridgeline, or hang a quarter of deer, etc. It's cheap entertainment, and keeps me off the streets and out of jail! No rude jokes about my artistry will be tolerated! I may yet join the ranks of Honorable Basket Weavers And Retail Meat Cutters - so mind your P's And Q's!!!!

My hat has a military flop hat look to it, and I'd like to put a hat pin on it like the 5 stars of a  brigadier general, or maybe the Globe & Anchor of the US Marines (I am probably one of their oldest fan boys)… but ya gotta watch it with crap like that. The vets get pissy when they perceive someone stepping on their toes. We always called my Grandpa a DP - he was a world war one vet and DP stood for Displaced Person. Back then there were a lot of fugged up POWs and refugees settling in Alberta, or DP's as they were called for short... and we all thought it was a big hoot to describe Grandpa as one of them. He took it as a badge of honour, in fact. But for my Dad, we all called him "The Ol' Vet". For us that evoked images of the mentally effed broken down derelict veterans with deep psychological problems - and we all thought that was a hoot as well. Big Bro even got him a personalized license plate that said "Ol Vet". Pop bolted it onto his truck and one day, while out camping with the senior's trailer club - one of the other geezers (who was a vet himself) saw it and asked him for details about his life in the service. When Pop explained that it was all a joke - the old boy flipped and gave Dad the very hell of it! Being a family of shitlibs at the time, we never even thought about how the vets might be incensed by something like that. Are any of you guys service men? Could I get a pin like that for my hat as a joke, or would the vets have a problem with it?

While I am all in favour of offending vibrants, queers, wahmen, commies and other leftist turd burglars... I do not want to offend the good guys. If any of you can make an informed call on that, I'd appreciate your two cents in the comments.

Cheers, and have a great weekend.

We're All Gonna Die!!!! AGAIN!!!!

Here we go again!!!! Everyone gobble in fright and go into hysterics!!! CORONAVIRUS IS COMING!!!!

I zipped my lip during The Great Ebola Scare and kept my own counsel while Pete and Aesop and the other stubfarts went nuts telling us how horrible things would get when the virus broke out. Mass graves!!!! Choked hospitals!!! Societal collapse!!!! Rotting corpses in the street!!! I think one of 'em was an ambulance driver which made him an expert on pandemics, immunology, microbiology and all the other stuff that takes normal people like us a lifetime to learn about. Yeah... whatever. From what I've seen on the net, the chinks got it from eating bats. Another source says it was snakes. It was on the internet, so ya know it just has to be true!

If we saw a pandemic sized breakout, yes, we absolutely ARE in some serious trouble, but today we have some new tools, an understanding of virology, transmission vectors, yadda yadda yadda. Here is what I would predict that would happen: Analytical-Chemistry-In-A-Bag would come to our rescue. Within days, possibly weeks, the medical industry would start distributing diagnosis kits. Rank and file civilians would be trained on how to use them. We see this now already in different applications. Farmers have kits for testing their own soils and water. People in the factories and plants can test their own effluents and feedstocks. No need for complex analyzers and chemists to run them - read the directions on the kit, take your sample - and go to town. Mass immunization programs would kick in. When I was a kid, every student in my school got their shots in a day. We're talking 600 kids, there. My dad used to have a special gun for zapping cattle with injections - they used a smaller, more gentle tool on us kids back then. That was back in the late 60's or early 70's. They're probably even faster now. And, you'd have official sites on the internet telling folks how to diagnose the disease, symptoms, and how to take care of patients, and neutralize contamination hazards.

Not trying to make light of this - no bones about it, dying from this disease would really suck. But good grief - enough with the fear mongering. You can get run over by a steam roller, or slip on a banana peel and fall down the stairs, or shoot yourself in the face with your bow when you are cleaning it!

So settle down! Most of the problem is in Asia right now - and there are too many of them as it is, HAR HAR HAR!!! Anything that thins 'em out a bit is a Good Thing! And to be honest, watching the stupid people running around in our countries... we could probably use a bit of a cull as well.

There's no doubt that this is serious business.... but chill the frick out.

Friday Music From The Poop Deck

I saw that one somewhere on Seven Seas of the innernet. I was in the crow’s nest of the HMCS Antelope when that bloody big Yank stove them in - and then they did the same to us!

Let this be a lesson, men: pick and choose your battles wisely. 😉👍

Have a great Friday!

Has Anyone Seen Quartermain???

I know he just has to be mixed up in this... 🤬🤬🤬

Thursday, 23 January 2020

All Rise

Judge Filthie presiding...

Back in the day my in-laws would spin me right up and drive me friggin nuts. All I could do was sit there and take it because I loved my wife and daughter, and they loved them... and the family peace had to be maintained. For thirty years I put up with some real shit. And - when the coast was clear, and the girls were looking the other way - I'd go right into the boards with those arseholes, usually my father in law... high sticking and cross checking for all I was worth, HAR HAR HAR! Then the womenfolk would see what was going on and we'd spit out our teeth, break it up and put our gloves back on and pick up the sticks. My in laws were weapons grade industrial strength assholes. This court is adjourned!!!

It's been a couple years now since we've seen them last. Life has since slowed to a crawl for me in that time, and I have more time to think about things... and I started thinking about my father in law. Like... really thinking about him. I have no idea what brought it on.

His mom passed away when he was a kid. His father was an alcoholic. He was a rugby star in high school and married one of the prettiest girls in his graduating class. They had three kids. Their youngest son was born with heart problems, and he passed away back in the 80's and the old man was devastated. Shortly after that, he lost his job with a company that he'd worked hard for, for over 30 years. He started in the mail room in his late teens, and rose up to be a branch manager. He gave the job everything he had, and moved his family across the country several times, going wherever the company needed him. When the company was sold, the new owners had their own people and wanted to get rid of him. They demoted him several times trying to get him to quit so they wouldn't have to pay him out - but he took his lumps and eventually they let him go with a severance package. He was devastated again and got another boot up the arse right on the heels of losing his son. He was a heavy drinker, as was I … and I suppose that lubricated the animosity between us. He thought his daughter deserved a better man than me (and he was right about that, maybe) … and wasn't shy about saying so. After losing his own son he doted on his granddaughter and loved her with all his soul. Last I heard, she rejected him too when she discovered that she was queer and a social justice warrior that was better than everyone else. I dunno what drove that - by then I'd been hurled into the void and exiled from the family because I have the wrong views about political correctness, queers, and social justice. I am a Yesterday Man and as obsolete as he is, I suppose. Maybe more so.

Does it change anything? Yes and no - I can think about the man now without wanting to murder him, I suppose, HAR HAR HAR!!! But... words and actions are like bullets and once you let them go you can never call them back. Sometimes the rifts between people are so deep, they won't be settled in this lifetime. Some vlogger I saw awhile back had an interesting theory: he regarded this world as punishment. If you mess up in this life by living badly and dying badly, you go to the next world, "where you are loaded onto the next vaginal turd, and born again back in this world where you get to do it all over again! The process repeats until you get it right!" HAR HAR HAR! HAR HAR HAR!

For me... think I will continue to use what little judgement I have the best I can. You do the same, and maybe we'll meet again in 80 or 90 years!

Have a great Thursday

Got A Little Snow

...which meant little footprints...

Wednesday, 22 January 2020

Introducing Yesterday Men To Suzy Subaru And Sally Soccer Mom

Recently we had a vicious but interesting debate in the stubfartosphere about the Gun Thing. All the usual suspects were at the cyber-mall food court, dressed in Velcro shoes and squishy depends diapers. The issue: in the US, open carry of firearms is legal. And it seems that a few of our guys had their milk curdle on them when some derpsters passed through the food court - with AR’s slung over their backs. The curmudgeons were all incensed! “The optics of that are horrible!! Non-gun people will see that and demand stricter gun controls!! There’s no need for that!!! How are we going to win Suzy Subaru and Sally Soccer Mom over to our side of the gun debate if morons are gonna run around in public with assault rifles slung like that!?!?” The issue came up again in the 2A demonstration in Virginia on Monday when some men showed up, armed with guns and ready to use them if necessary.

I looked up from my lumpy, dismal glass of Orange Metamucil and politely said, “Oh, stuff it, you stupid old women! They are within their rights, they haven’t broken any laws, so shut your gobs and mind your own beeswax!”

And then the food fight was on. Elderly geezers chimped out in every direction, and all started cursing and swearing at once! Aesop threw a bottle of viagra at me in a rage. I gave him the frowning of his life, and Borepatch fibrillated and started to go into cardiac arrest. Mall security showed up and we were all gently but firmly rolled out the door by smirking mall cops. Fuggin kids!!!🤬🤬🤬😡

One of the mistakes that old farts like BP and Aesop make in the gun control debate is classic. For years i made that same mistake myself. I come from a family of shitlibs - so you can probably guess where they stood on guns. When we fought about it in my family, I always lost. I didn’t get it. I memorized facts and figures. My stats in my arguments came right from law enforcement agencies like the RCMP and the FBI. They were a matter of public record. But still, every time we talked about it... I lost. I thought that maybe it was my delivery? I thought that if I could just present the facts the right way, that these progs and liberals might see things in a differently. But, whatever I tried, it was to no avail. The only way to less crime are gun bans!!

The Z Man has an excellent synopsis of the gun debate here.

The fact is that the heart and soul of the anti gun movement are emotional white shitlib women. Women like Sally Soccer Mom, and Susie Subaru. They dominate their men because they are smarter than they are, and fighting with them is a waste of time. Sally Soccer Mom thinks with her emotions. Her personal priority in life is to nurture and hone them. She gets up in the morning and gets the family going. She drives the kids to school in a minican and drops them off. Then she goes to yoga class to feed her spirituality. Afterwards, she dips into Starbucks to chatter with the coffee klatch and gossip with the girls. She gets her info from Slate, the Huffington Post, The View, Vox, and other progressive liberal sources. At the end of the day she checks in with her children to make sure they learned their lessons, and that they think and play the right way. She’s confidently assured by the pozzed media that she is powerful, independent and wise. She’s assured that things like race, sexuality, morals and ethics ... are all relative and can be whatever she thinks they should be, as long as they make her feel good. She’s told that toxic masculinity is the cause of all evil in society, and the only way to control bad men is with good govt. She believes that it is perfectly logical for a retarded 16 year old schoolgirl to lecture and scold a US President about the environment. If you present her a choice between security or freedom, she will pick security every time, regardless of cost. Where do you think such women will fall on the realities of issues  like gun control and crime?

And men like Aesop and Borepatch think they will change the minds of these women? Good luck with that boys!😆👍

My experience is that it doesn’t matter how well you present your facts or frame your viewpoints to these women and their cucked men. They will not be swayed by courtesy, reason, or anger and bombast. They are smarter than you are (they are DEFINITELY smarter than any man!) and to them, Greta Thunberg, Orca Winfrey, Whoopi Goldberg, AOC and Hillary Clinton are edgy intellectuals.

Old world men are chivalrous and fair. They were brought up that way, and were expected to respect reason and truth. If you place him in an argument with a modern progressive woman, he will lose every time. The realities of complex issues like gun control offend such women. Because they are led by their emotions they will never be convinced to respect the virtues of an armed citizenry. Left unchecked, they will bring the roof down on themselves and their men too.

My experience with them is that not only arguing with them is a waste of time, but so is appeasing them. If anyone wants to change my mind, feel free to have at it in the comments.

Thanks for dropping in and have a great day.

Tuesday, 21 January 2020

Some Final Thoughts On The Virginia Derpapalooza

Well, that was a cracking good show in Virginia - and congrats to all the patriots that showed up and took the time to go. As a Canadian gun owner, I know what happens when liberal morons get their way with gun laws.

My moral and intellectual superiors in the gunny community predicted a chit show and a blood bath in Virginia, thinking that left wing activists would engineer a confrontation that would end in bloodshed, which in turn would be spun by the media and used to justify more gun grabs. It wasn’t an unreasonable supposition; the slobs in the mass media have done it before.

But things have changed now. Remember that high school kid in the MAGA hat? The one the journos said was a smirking racist because he smiled at a vagrant native that was beating a Tom-Tom in front of him? They kinda shat the bed on that one, others were watching and taking vids too... and they caught the entire incident and displayed it on social media, not just the edited clip that CNN aired. The boy was cleared of any wrong doing, CNN got taken to the cleaners for trying to smear him and had to settle out of court, and a valuable lesson was learned by all - and put to good use in Virginia.

It used to be that the Donks could hatch a plot, and count on their lickspittles in the media to smear their enemies with impunity. The media journos and editors made sure that no inconvenient questions got asked, that wrong thinkers and dissidents got nowhere near a microphone, and that only the correct opinions could be drawn from their carefully edited work. Lies were published as truth, facts were twisted and/or left out completely, and the cultural narrative and popular opinion was whatever they decided it would be.

In Virginia, Lefty got a very, very rude surprise. When they turned their cameras against the people of Virginia, the people turned on their cell phone cameras and focused them back on the media slobs. If the fags at CNN or the Donks had any illusions about pulling a fast one with an engineered false flag event ... all those cameras staring back at them would give them pause. If the police had any ideas about letting an orchestrated riot happen, courtesy of liberal flunkies in Antifa...armed citizens were there to restore order. With the eyes and guns of patriots trained on them... the Donks wisely chose to behave themselves. You can bet the cops will too.

Additionally: new players are in the game. Consider crowd sourced psyop citizen groups like Q. They have eyes and ears right in Donk offices, ready to rat them out when they take a run at the cookie jar. We live in wondrous times... the days of liberal fart suckers duping entire nations are effectively  over. Not since the invention of the printing press have we seen such a cultural revolution. For the first time in decades, the publicity/information war has all the teams on a level playing field... and it shows.

Long story short - not only did the Yanks throw defences up around the Second Amendment... they made a helluva show for the First as well! 😁👍

Good work, men! You’re an inspiration to us all. So now, you find yourselves with a say in forming public opinion. You have the means to keep tabs on your representatives and expose them when they betray you.

The only question now is... what will you do with these abilities?

This Bud’s for you, Aesop!

Filthie’s Funnies

GAH! I gotta stop hanging out at Gab...
Do you remember cartoons like this in he newspaper?
We got the mother load of comics every Sunday.
The strips were longer and in colour.
You’d never see filthy humour like this in them,
but they were often good for a smirk or a chuckle 

Getting Around

Welp, the cold snap ended yesterday and we got the Dawgmobile cranked over and running. We had about a week of -30C and it was kinda tough. Macey is too old for those kind of temps but she still thinks she wants to go out. We kept the walks really short during the cold snap, and yesterday I took them out for a long walk. Macey was bushed but happy afterward. We even met some of the usual senior delinquents as we made our rounds.

I went in for my second job interview with a competitor. It's tough to read. I am a senior sales guy that knows his way around - but I am also old, white and male. My interviewers were friendly and positive if that means anything. I should know one way or the other in a week or 10 days. Whatever happens will happen.

Today the skies are clear and blue and the temps are going to be warm for a bit. Other than that, we are pretty boring around here as usual.

Filthie Goes To The Therapist

Prince Harold has the tongues of the peasantry flapping at 100 MPH. I dunno what to think of it all, myself. I have always been a fan of Harry - he has a history of making his own decisions and being his own man. I've heard all kinds of trash about his wife, some of which may or may not be true. I won't say anything about her because Harry sees something in her, and a fella has to respect that.

Needless to say the gums are flapping at the Glob and Snail too! Oh no!!!! It's a Royal Family Estrange-MINT!!!!! 😆👍 The article goes on to learn us everything we need to know about family estrangement, courtesy of The Experts - and the menstrual hags of the Globe, of course! No, Harold and his wife are not checking out of their families. But for those of us that have, the article makes for interesting reading.

"The old thinking was that families should mend their problems and stick together, no matter what. In today’s individualistic culture, more people are putting themselves ahead of family ties, setting boundaries and maintaining space from damaging relatives in a bid for self-preservation. As with the modern acceptance of divorce, those growing up in Meghan and Harry’s generation enjoy more societal permission to walk away from toxic dynamics, instead of toughing it out at all costs."

Without shared morals, ethics, and values - families can't stay together. In today's day and age, it's okay for me to have my morals and ethics, for you to have yours, for the queers to have theirs, for the vibrants to have theirs, etc etc. And, when families fall apart.. the communities and nations won't be far behind. I think the therapists and specialists over at The Glob don't get that. They are social engineers, struggling to find out why their theories aren't working. Having been through the estrangement wringer, for my two cents the best thing that you can do, if you are confronted with it, is get over it and move on. It's easy to say and very, very hard to do. It's not fair, it's life. Without a foundation and a moral compass, things like this are going to happen and people have to do the best they can for themselves.

I wish Harold and his wife the best of luck. They are going to need it.

Sunday, 19 January 2020

Derpapalooza, Huh?

Apparently the innernet's foremost history scholar predicts a chit show at Virginia's 2A demonstration to protest the gubbimint's intention to start confiscating guns they don't think you should have. (Included, at no extra charge, is some classic Johnny Cash music). Fags like Aesop are screaming bloody murder; that that demonstration is a democrat psyop trap: Leftie is going to bus in pANTIFA street thugs to stir something up, with the hope that someone gets shot... and then they'll send them out in paddywagons and coffins. The event will be spun as an antigun morality play for the left and used as justification to grab more guns. In a rare exception to the general rule, he's probably right about that, HAR HAR HAR!!!

I love Americans but sometimes you perplex me. Indulge me: Most of your wars have been fought to defend freedoms like the right to self defense, the right to assemble and demonstrate and speak freely and so on. All skepticism aside, America goes to war with countries led by tyrants and gangster gov'ts. If I am not mistaken, every serviceman swears an oath to defend your beautiful constitution from all enemies, foreign and domestic too. I think it was du Toit that said the political process starts at the soap box, goes to the ballot box, and ends with the cartridge box if certain people want to be assholes about it. I ain't telling anyone what to do or think... but you gunnies have a big problem in Virginia and one that will probably spread if it isn't dealt with. Just sayin'. And - I don't think it's only your problem, either.

Some other things I notice, as a Canadian sticking my long nose into your affairs - the wheels are coming off Leftie's bus. So far your Democrat candidates for the next election consist of doddering, elderly Boomers with long track records of corruption, screeching unhappy wahmen - or younger failed liberal social experiments that never grew up. Near as I can tell, the sanest one of the batch is a butt blasting faggot. The rest should all be either in jail or under responsible adult supervision. They all think America should flood itself with third world vermin, and want to give them free health care while you pay through the nose for yours. Nancy P has turned the somber, serious process of presidential impeachment into a shitlib hissy fit for Democrat cloud people and champagne socialists. How many of you got that patriotic feeling when she turned that thing into an opportunity to give fancy pens away to her cool friends for a photo op? In her state of California, the lights and power go out on a regular basis, people shit on the street, and anyone wanting a future is leaving. (Then they go to other states and vote for the same crap that destroyed the one they came from). Nancy lives in a mansion patrolled by armed guards behind a wall to keep the peasantry out, while she accuses working Americans of greed, racism, sexism, homophobia... while she rubs shoulders with guys that were regular guests of the late Mr. Epstein on Pervert Island. Things are getting so bad in California that having a gun around makes as much sense as having a carbon monoxide alarm and fire extinguisher in the house. 20 years ago, California alone had a bigger economy than my entire country. Things are getting serious now, and they can't go on like that without something giving somewhere.

Again, I am not telling anyone what to do. I live in Canada where gun grabbers, faggots, Marxists, and menstrual/menopausal women run the show. I keep my sanity by keeping a low profile myself, if ya catch my drift. I don't know what to do about shit like this, because I am just a plaid clad Fudd with an arsehole and an opinion. But I will tell you what maybe you shouldn't be doing - and that is mocking 2A patriots that are going to show up in Virginia tomorrow to protest an attack on their rights and freedoms. Before the leftwing Baby Boomers, it used to be that demonstrations, protests, and assassinations were big deals. Today a star witness like Epstein gets killed in cold blood while in prison and people shrug and make jokes about it. I don't think that assembly tomorrow will be a shitshow - mayhap it'll be history in the making?

I wonder if everyone thought it was Derpapalooza when the Archduke of Austria was shot? I still remember my haunted grandfather saying that it started off as a hoot. They were going to go Over There, have an adventure, clobber some kraut morons, hang the Kaiser and be home for Christmas. These are our 'good ol' days' too, I suppose.

Have a great Sunday y'all.

Friday, 17 January 2020

New Substitute Teacher At Uncle Bob's School For Wayward Retards: Disaster Preparation


If you're like me, and had problems getting your poop in a group when it came to camp tarp management - don't feel bad! Help is on the way, courtesy (as usual) of the Green Bean United States Fuggin Marines With The M16's!!!!! Even if you camp in an RV - having a tarp set up is mighty nice.

The corporal will learn ya everything ya need to know
about lashing down tarps in 5 minutes.

I am one of those guys that has to have a tarp up for camping. In our last family camping trip together 100 years ago I set one up and did it right. I rigged it with ropes and poles and the grandparents threw out TV tables, chairs, nibblies and drinks and were happier than bugs in a rug under there - it kept the rain and the sun off - with room for a table, cards and games. Even in a torrential downpour, we had a fire going and were dry outside.

I dunno if I like paracord or not. The stuff always seems to stretch! Even in mild winds my lashings and hitches loosened. I went to small diameter nylon rope and it was better but not perfect. In any kind of wind tarps can be bears to handle. I like to use rope and wooden dowel type 'cheaters' to tension them up. But - if ya don't have ropes and cheaters... maybe these knots and lashings will get you by? The thing I love about paracord is that it is easy to undo knots and tangles too.

Behave yourselves with Corporal Kelly on YouTube - or you
can deal with his good friend, Corporal Punishment! 
Leave him a thumbs up and send any interested kids or preppers a link to his vids.

And yes - in case you're wondering I am VERY familiar with Corporal Punishment. I try to avoid him and his CO - Major Disaster - if I can. I seem to run into General Direction on the rifle range regularly - usually when I am flying Maggie's drawers. I would have made a good Marine in my youth - but I was too chicken.

Have yourselves an AWESOME Saturday - and practice your knots!  There may be a test later on, and you WILL want to pass it!

I didn't know that hammock camping was a thing back in the 60's
when I was a kid.

The Filthie Safety Nazi: Not Funny

I dunno who the wisenheimer is that came up with this one. Us old hands are smart enough to see the horrible peril and danger this thing represents. But for you retards and younger fellas - that thing is all fun n' games until it accidentally gets used for a church bake sale. Or the old lady decides to bean ya with it.

Just a reminder that homo-cides involving fry pans, rolling pins and  blunt force trauma - are automatically ruled by the courts as justifiable and are dismissed without prejudice in Canada AND the USA.

Husbands and boyfriends are wise to prank their gals accordingly.

If Course It Is Sweetheart

Oooooooookay, Millenial.

One of the things that drove me nuts about my former shitlib family in-laws is that topics of discussion often devolved to stuff like this. I always wondered if I was being trolled or if they were serious about it! Too often I laughed and got the frowning of my life for my inappropriate laughter. Filthie, thy name is micro-aggression, HAR HAR HAR!!!  Most of those idiots all had university degrees too! Just goes to show that education and intellect are two VERY different things nowadays. If this chickie is any indication, I think we need to have a word with our educators, and that some remedial action needs to be taken. Guillotines and gallows might be required - just sayin'. 

Go get him, Blondie! Give him the very hell of it
for his littering!!!!
This is an outrage to the environMINT!!!!

I'd do it... but I am bigoted, racist, homophobic, chauvinistic... and probably
personally responsible for all that man's problems.
Food coma is the way guys like me oppress vibrant minorities, dontchya know...😆👍


I Need A Crapper Like This

B - But... But...Muh Naptha....!!!

I love these things and I always will. I got an LED one the size of a hockey puck that will put out more light, strobe, and do different colours... throw a loop of paracord round it and hang it in a tree and it will light up your camp just fine - without setting it on fire.

But it isn’t the same. I can smell the Coleman. I can hear it. The light is a companionable yellow and not the actinic white of LED’s. (Or the strobing red of a submarine going to battle stations).

I don’t have one anymore; as I get older the practicality vs nostalgia thing seems to have gone against me.

It might be time to rectify that. 😊👍

Still in the deep freeze here folks. Hope all is well with you, and that the weather breaks soon!🥶

Wednesday, 15 January 2020

Where's My Warble Gloaming, Greta?

Greta Toonberg is so fuggin dumb, even Uncle Bob's Institute For Wayward Retards turned her application for enrollment down. It is my conviction that religious faith is being replaced with shithouse consensus science. The polar bears are thriving, Greenpeace got stranded up north and had to be rescued by an ice breaker, there's record snowfall in Hongcouver, former weather models are debunked... and the monkeys still sing and dance to the old tired tune. If we had a dustbowl event like the one in the Dirty 30's - the envirotards would hurl retards like Greta into a volcano to appease the weather gods, HAR HAR HAR!!! Errrrr…. yannow that might not be a bad idea after all, HAR HAR HAR! They could throw in Greta for an appetizer - then toss in Fat Al Gore for the main course... and then pitch in David Zucchini for dessert! HAR HAR HAR!😆👍

She was a little crispy out there this morn, folks. The cell phone said it was -36C, the old lady's car said -38C, and the thermometer on the wall said -42C. Whatever it is - it's getting down there.

They're hopping from wad to wad to keep their feet warm!
Somebody should look in on the birds and CM
at Coopville. 
If they are getting this weather they probably all have The Rig*
by now.

*Rigor Mortis

I don't mind cold weather, I have the gear and if I wanted I could go for a nice comfy stroll out there. I have one of those big bejeezus Canada Goose parkas and insulated pants that they use on polar expiditions. Problem is the dawgs - Mort is a big shaggy galoot so he'd be okay... but ... Macey. Cripes, she's half blind, arthritic, and senile and she tuckers out fast. We'll just stay in today, thanks.

It has to get colder than this to make taking a leak a problem.
A dump, on the other hand, can be problematic
given the heat exchange surfaces and durations involved. Texans, truck drivers
and rig pigs could do it... but civilians will
need special accomodations for cold weather work like that.

I used to work in this stuff though. When you get down this low, there's no bones about it: you have to take it seriously or it will kill you if you're not careful.

Somewhere on the job in my last life.
Probably February, Fort McMuck. Fort Hills? Firebag?
I can't remember.
In February, the clouds give way, the skies turn crystal clear and blue and beautiful...
and the temps drop like a stone.

I only got hypothermia once in my life, and it's true what they say - it creeps up on you. If you're out there - just be aware of yourself. Ordinarily the gunnies and dissident conservatives are fond of saying "Stay Frosty Boys!"

Today is not the day for that! Stay warm.


Tuesday, 14 January 2020

The Rhyme Of The Filthie Submariner

I think the appeal of the idea of sea monsters is rooted in our genetics. Who knows what lurks down there?

A Nibble

Well I had a good job interview awhile back with one of my former competitors last week. We talked about the business and asked each other a few questions and it seemed to go well. I was honest as I could be and was pretty much myself, I even bathed and shaved for the occasion and refrained from telling rude jokes. They got squishy on some questions I asked... but I pretty much knew the answers to them before I asked them... and they knew I knew too. If nothing else, I know that we play the same game, and it looks like we play the same way...

But... they called me in for another interview next week. I know I can do the job, I think they know I can too. The problem is this: what their idea of a senior sales guy is... may be different than mine. And with our economy in shambles right now... beggars can’t be choosers. We’ll see what happens.

For now it’s -32C out. I think the block heater’s out on the Dawgmobile...she cranked this morning, coughed, and farted...but didn’t catch. Truck is 12 years old so maybe it might be time for a new battery too. Whatever... I ain’t gonna screw around with it today.

You guys stay warm.



Monday, 13 January 2020

The Filthie Historian: Time To Switch Gears..?

While I knock about the internet I run into everything the human animal has to offer. I can sip a coffee and be civil with the high brows and gentlemen like BP and TB and BW... or burp and fart with the other losers on Gab... and punch it out (or getting punched out) with commies and nasty wahmen and sexual degenerates on the political blogs and sites. Everything's a learning experience. The human animal is an intensely fascinating but dangerous critter to watch.

One of the most fascinating exercises I see is when the tall foreheads start contrasting modern politics, issues, and current events with those of say, ancient Greece or Rome. I do not portend to be an intellectual, academic or a specialist on ancient cultures. I have a very rudimentary understanding of ancient Rome and could spend the rest of my life immersed in it - never mind all the other interests demanding my attention. So - maybe I DO get a bit of it when the egg heads compare the Empire with The Buckwheat Administration for example.

But one thing the experts seem to miss in their comparisons and contrasts with Rome. If you look at the Roman Empire over its history - there were times when half the senate murdered the troublesome other half - and put a tyrant in charge because that is what their civilization needed to survive. At other times, they murdered the tyrant and made the empire a republic. They did what they needed to do to survive. Sometimes that only resulted in bloody civil wars.

I wonder if we in the western world are at the same fork in the road they were? The laws that matter have already been changed. Others are ignored or disregarded with impunity. Many of our leaders are just plain nuts - like they are clinically off their bloody rockers.

Would it be such a bad thing, if a few of our leaders were surrounded by their peers - and stabbed to death and left to bleed out as a warning to the others?

It's becoming abundantly clear that our republics can't last much longer.

Manic Monday Meme Mummery: CAUTION - Some Are Fit Only For Bookface