Filthie's Mobile Fortress Of Solitude

Filthie's Mobile Fortress Of Solitude
Where Great Intelligence Goes To Be Insulted

Saturday, 31 October 2020

Turdo La Doo Establishes Firm Limits On Free Speech


Turdo La Doo tells us that there's firm limits on the Freedom Of Speech. Freedom innint free, dontchya know. The wit of this part time substitute drama teacher continues to amaze.

Fortunately our American friends at Gab are on the ball, and are more than happy to indulge our pink socked prime minister in his love for multiculturalism!

The great American cultural melting pot!!!

This is the state of white supremacy today. Seriously. Do you feel any more racist now that you've seen this? Our gubbimints think so. Stuff like this promotes hateyness, dontchya know. Whereas sawing the head of a woman on a shopping trip is a reasonable reaction to cartoons. The idiots that rule us believe this crap, they have bloated, useless law enforcement agencies with massive budgets to do.... something... about stuff like this.

Sometimes, all you can do is laugh, pocket a spare magazine, and wait for the stupidity to pass.

The older I get, the more I love Halloween and seeing the kids. There’s not many around that still do it in my neighborhood, and I think the Chinkypox will probably thin out the trick or treaters even more. I love the little ones they way old people do.

It’s the big ones I can’t stand! Quartermain will be along to poop in my jackolantern in the evening... then Jack with the eggs... and then Pete with the toilet paper. Do they sell rubber bullets to civilians?

I hope you and yours have some good plans for the occasion, and that your little ones make out like bandits.


Can’t Catch A Break...


Friday, 30 October 2020

Tard Halloween Party Guidlines

 With everything being offensive these days, it pays to take extra care when dressing up for the big day! One of Canada's biggest turd brained special ed kids - Justin Turdo - dressed up in black face a couple years back and went to the Halloween tard party dressed as a nogger. I guess it's okay if the really stupid, really hopeless kids do it because he got a pass on it. For those of you with IQ's above freezing - here are some helpful guidelines to help prevent future embarassMINT.



The Filthie Seer


Well they totally pooched mine.
And my wife’s...
And Big Bro....



I used to be of a similar frame of mind but no more. Not by a long shot. That’s the sum knowledge of all mankind in your pocket. And gosh... I loves me my apps. I got my ballistics calculator on it, a level app, some wind and weather apps, even my bible is on it. And I dare say this about that: Dagwood will get far more utter bullshit out of that newspaper than I’ll get from my phone. Unless it’s required for a rude joke... there’s no place in my life for that. That phone is a tool and it’s like fire or gubbimint... you are supposed to master them, not the other way around. 

I hear the various blogging stubfarts with dire warnings about how phones are used to invade our privacy and let our rulers control and keep tabs on us. Welp... guess what? It helps ME keep tabs on THEM too! Our rulers think we’re all dumb sheep and we often accuse each other of it as we chew on our cud. But... one lone lunatic with a .22 almost put Ronald Reagan away. An organized, trained marksman ended JFK. Supposedly those guys had all the king’s horses and all the king’s men looking out for them too. They are careful not to show it, but rulers fear their people too... and they damned well should! It keeps them honest.

It’s important to maintain perspective.

Friday Night Cards With The Tards...

Who’s dealing this shite???
Gawdammit!!! I’ll take four, Quartermain...

Wicker, Huh?


I never developed a taste for it, because I never really thunk about it much. We used those cheap big, soulless mass produced tupperware tubs ya buy from Home Despot. They certainly work... but they don’t have the warmth or charm that wicket does.

Oh No - Not Again!


I just roared with laughter at how the memers drove Lefty
nuts with rage using the little green cartoon character.
In the last election Hillary Clinton 
was reduced to a spitting, gobbling wreck by him.

Thursday, 29 October 2020

Danger Zones


Yannow, I look at the hysterics, histrionics and lunacy of our times... and I often wonder if it isn't the product of botched childhood. I'm not talking about kids born into horrific or abusive circumstances either. I am talking about the kids with helicopter parents, going to schools where playgrounds were dismantled by safety nazis and lawyers, and teachers that think a child's self esteem is more important than their education. You don't see injuries from that right up front the way you do when kids like these two dare devils get a little too comfortable with Darwin and Murphy. You don't see the joy in them like this either.

The changing times have been hard on us guys and I have bitched about it like many others... but hell's bells. If it has been bad for us guys, it has been absolutely murder on our gals. 25% of 'em are on antidepressants or other psychotropic drugs. Half their marriages end in failure, and they instigate 80% of them. I wonder if their self destructive behaviors aren't a subconscious effort at establishing and maybe capturing the high of living in the danger zones that their childhood denied them?

But - whadda I know? Y'all go out and do something dangerous and/or fun. Life is too short for the happy person, and far too long for those that aren't.

Singin’ In The Rain

 Well it warmed up again for us up here. We had some snow but it’s all gone. Might even be warm enough to rain a time or two yet. I’ll take it and smile. Hope your Thursday is going as well as can be; and, as always - thanks for dropping in!

The New Swiss Army Wrench...


Today’s LOL


I think this is going to be the expression 
on a lot of gun owners faces 
when the ballon goes up.

I’m just as pleased as punch. A young man at our
church just bought a gun on my recommendation.
I recommended a Glock 19 
but he went for the Sig P320. That’s a
better choice, IMHO.

Another rebel for Turdo La Doo and his gun grabbers
to worry about! 👍

Wednesday, 28 October 2020

Meanwhile, Up In Canada...

 ... the fags at the CBC were running a headline entitled, "Canada Quietly Prepares For A Biden Presidency". 

Dear Mr. Trump,

Congratulations on your second term! I hope we'll be seeing more winning in the days ahead.

In that vein - would you please consider adopting Alberta and Saskatchewan as the 51st and 52nd states respectively at your earliest opportunity? We are much like Texans - only better looking and with better manners. In return for you indulgence, we offer viable and competitive oil industries ready to rip! Our northern regions would also make an excellent site for political prison camps. Fort Chip, for example, is full of smelly alcoholic indians, bears, black flies and mosquitoes. It would make an excellent place for creeps like Hillary, Obutthole, and Creepy Joe to live out the rest of their days amidst the froots of diversity, welfare, and socialism! (As an aside, I am an expert in handling retards, gimps, turd burglars and jack nasties. I'd be happy to offer my services in running such a facility remotely from here in Aaaaaaadmontin).

Please call me at your earliest convenience so that we can discuss these issues constructively. In the meantime - congratulations again - and may your second term be as good as the first!

Cordially yours,

Dr. G. Filthie

If You Had Super Powers... What Would Ya Do With ‘Em?


I’d go to Ottawa, grab our faggot faced
Prime minister, fly him up to 10,000 ft...
and drop him!

Then I’d retire.

Not A Problem


Get A Reloader!!!!

 It's gonna be something of a theme. It can't be said often enough.

The World's Greatest Handyman is seeing one hell of an all out ammo shortage. It's truly bizarre: What little is on the shelves are "odd ball calibers." The oddball calibers are ironically cherished by reloaders for their obscurity and it actually becomes part of the charm of shooting with them. If that ammo is sitting there in these times... it will take forever to sell it. But for mainstream ammo - this is exactly what the shelves will look like when the SHTF. You need to prepare for this.

Jump on this. Start cruising fleabay and find a press. Then get dies. Do it slowly a piece at a time. A scale. A hand prime tool. If you do it over time you can probably sneak the expenditures right past the old lady without nary a comment!

Kim du Toit advocates giving Lefty the finger by buying guns and ammo on certain days of the year. That's okay for him - he fancies himself as a gentleman. I want to kick Lefty in the nards, bend him over a rail and make him bark like a pig!!! I say that if you want to do the same to the gun grabbers, buy a reloader, and learn to cast your own bullets for the appropriate calibers. You will then be able to handle a SHTF situation with ease, and be as well prepared as you can be for a TEOTWAWKI situation as you can be.


Tuesday, 27 October 2020


Up here in Aaaaaaadmontin the vast majority of our houses are under 60 years old. The homes much older than that are getting knocked down and replaced for the most part, except for a few neighborhoods where the yuppies got in and made a hobby out of resurrecting the older homes and restoring them. It’s not cheap; the old homes had newspapers and straw and sawdust insulation, and electrical arrangements that gives the fire department nightmares.

Around here these old homes are a real treasure.


The Coronatard Philharmonic Pops


Unfortunately, given the realities of
They’re probly all still alive!



The Rides Of The Celebrity Blogtards

Yannow I wish I had the money that some of these glamorous bloggers have... and nothing better to do with it than tart up my ride! 

Hmpffff!!! A Coopville deVille!!!
Wouldn’t be surprised at all if that one doesn’t have air conditioning 
and electric windahs...

That’s gotta be BP and that creepy Silicon Greybeard again!
Looks like they’ve been messing with the space/time continuum again
and shrunk themselves!
Just as Wirecutter is fond of saying:
fuck around and find out!

Speaking of the knuckle dragger - I’m really
liking his personalized truck!
That Terd Ferguson pose will make it a chick

Good work as usual Phil!
The man’s an artist!

How did THAT one get in there?
Of course, that’s my ride. I’ve been invited to
a turkey shoot in Seattle and I needed to bring the bait.
Should be a good time...

That’s the adaptive curmudgeon... I guess
he’s completely amphibious 

Mad Jack, of course.
Ive always admired the man’s sunny disposition 
and positive outlook!

WL’s new ride. 
Rumour has it that he just shot and kilt a
Coronavirus and had it stuffed and mounted in his library...

Dunno who that is... du Toit, maybe...?

That’s Comrade Misfit.
I see ol’ Cow Cnut is still suffering from 
TDS along with all her other psychological problems.

Much as I hate lefties and liberals...
I can’t help but feel a little bit sorry for Joe Biden.
They should just put him and his creepy son in jail
and be done with it.

Aw jeez, Quartermain...!!!

Not to get all philosophical or anything... but we North Americans really need to get on top of our obsession with the automobile. I saw a pink Jeep the other day with eye lashes on the headlights. I remember some wine soaked feminist rage head once said that a man’s car was a 20 foot extension of his penis. So whadda ya call a pink Jeep with eyelashes? A 15 foot episiotomy? GAH!

Think I’m gonna go for a long walk in the country with Mort today. I hope your weekend is well underway, and that your day goes swimmingly!

Monday, 26 October 2020

Can Anybody Gibs Me Some Money!!!

 I know I’m involuntarily semi-retired now. I know I have to be financially responsible. And I can’t just go prancing off, spending money willy-nilly on any farkle that grabs my fancy. Sob. But...

I NEED this videeyah game!
It has Ronald in it!!!

If the readers all chip in and get me set up, me and three
other obnoxious tards will take it
down to the basement and you’ll never see us again!
If that isn’t a bargain, I dunno what is! 😊👍

Gawd I wish I could play video games.
Jeez... I miss Reagan. And Nancy R.
They were good folks.

Quartermain Lands A Beaut!!!


*scrabbing madly*
Hang onto ‘em, Quartermain!!!
Don’t let him get away!!!
Goddammit!!! Where’s the friggin fish bonker!?!?

Fire up the BBQ, Jack!!!

Today’s Toxic Rude Joke

 I am offended by this.

Oh gawd, that sucks.
Why - if someone told me that joke to my face,
I’d body slam him (or her)...
pommel them into submission and force them
to apologize.

Just because a joke is clean
doesn’t mean it’s 

I will tolerate no
on this important topic.

I am Going To Hell



 I dunno why - but you can bet your bottom dollar some POS POC somewhere will be offended by it. Over on Blab they had this big black bloated mamajamma with an ass two axe handles wide who made a living lecturing white people on all their evil racisms and bad thinks and wrongness. It’s called ‘critical race theory’. They’ve come out with an even more ridiculous branch of this science called intersectionality - where the goal is to define which victim group is more oppressed than the others, and rank them in some kind of order. Right now, as near as I can tell, it’s not clear whether a lard assed foul mouthed black woman is more oppressed than an unpleasant horse faced lesbian with an awful haircut, a flat chest and BO. The science that will be used to sort this out is called “intersectionality”. It’s more popular with The People Of Pronouns, so I’m told.

The last guys that rationalized their hate like that ran around with swastikas on their arms. I don’t think we have to worry about gulags and concentration camps because none of these morons could run one if their lives depended on it.

I suppose we’re going to find out for sure soon. 


Sunday, 25 October 2020

Four Strong Winds

They may blow cold in Alberta...
But they needn’t be lonely...


Neil Young is the classic shitlib that managed to always fall upward. The guy can’t sing, and when he actually DID come out to Alberta, the fag started running his mouth about the oil patch and environmentalism and the ordinarily friendly Albertans politely ignored him. When he left, few noticed, and more than a few were glad to be rid of him. He’s not a nice guy or particularly bright.

And yet, in spite of that... he has one or two toons that knock it out of the park.

We have a skiff of snow on the ground today, winter has not yet decided whether it wants to stay or not. At this time of year... I’m good either way.

Have yourselves a good one, and thanks for stopping by. Have a great Sunday.

Sunday Perspective


But...when she starts rattlin’ those pots n’ pans?

All is forgiven.

Saturday, 24 October 2020

An Atomic Blast From The Past


Looking back on it, I guess the shitlibs were always crazy. Back in the days of the Cold War, all of ‘em round here were sure that after the Reds turned Washington into green glass slag - they’d do us up here in Aaaaaaadmontin next because of all our oil and petrochemical plants. By their reckoning we were number 2 on the list. Good gravey ... those disarmament morons were so tiresome. Their endless sobbing and bitching made guys like the Coronatards look sane! And their anti-war songs...they got away with them because they were usually sung by smoking hot female shitlib singers. It’s truly amazing how bad those toons were. Can you imagine if a regular guy sang them? You’d start chucking rotten vegetables at ‘em just to shut them the hell up! Don’t believe me?


You asked for it:

Oh gawd that’s gross!
Shut the hell up, Bob!!!

As Uncle Bob used to say... there is nothing new under the sun. It was ever thus.

Have a great Saturday night, y’all!😉

Not To Put Too Fine A Point On It...

 The other day I was grumping about my favourite childhood movie and presented the original segment where the ‘58 Roadster does a dramatic orbital re-entry and what was - for the time - cutting edge animation combined with leading edge art of the day. Of course, the retarded kids in Southpark had to ruin my fond memories forever!!! Sob!🤬

This one popped up in my OyTube feed today. The kids are producing this stuff in their mom’s basement. CG is a far more powerful and accessible medium for the artistically inclined. Consider them in our time: paints, canvas, brushes...that stuff is prohibitively expensive for kids. How much for the programs to do this stuff?


The kids can copy and maybe improve on some of the old stuff... but they seem to bog down trying to produce original content. I hope that once this empire dies - one will arise that can do truly new and respectable art and literature.

Are ya feeling old yet?😉👍

Oi! That’s Not A Knife Part 8

 Yes, I am back at it with the knives. The issue is that I have other issues running too. I’m making ammo for the Retirement Rifles. Both are black powder replicas using reduced smokeless powder charges and require the use of fillers to aid correct combustion... and that is a huge time suck. I have to cast the bullets for them from soft lead, which adds to that. I’m not griping - I love all of it! 😊

My archery - gawddmmitalltohell. Typically I shoot a FITA score in the low 270’s. A perfect score is 300. When I was a kid I was in the mid to high 280’s and sometimes the 290’s - and that with a heavy hunting bow. A serious target shooter is typically in the high 290s. My scores are abysmal and I need to get serious and bring them up a bit. The range time is going up.

It all eats into my time on the blades. I’m sanding the pig sticker at 600 grit now... and going nowhere fast. I have about half of it done. With the little Damascus hunter, I had to re-sand it in a fit of road rage. The lacquer had settled in blobs and looked like hell. I had temper tantrum that almost reached Donald Duck levels, HAR HAR HAR! Yannow... I haven’t been that mad in years. Back when my family was still together, I’d get revved up like that on a daily basis. I used to drink like a fish too. Of course, my stupidity wasn’t their fault... but they sure didn’t help it either! HAR HAR HAR!

There... that’s a bit better...
Hopefully I can get the sheath going this week and get it outta here.

The employment situation is still messed up here. There are companies hiring, but they are the type that have a revolving door for their employees. Every couple of months they are on the boards looking to replace their sales guys. They are looking to find the highly qualified people that will work miracles - and do it for free. They are too dumb to realize that guys like that will make more money competing against them or working for themselves.

Between Covid, the recession, and the idiots we have for a leaders... the job situation will not improve any time soon. I’m still looking, I’d rather not retire yet... but who knows what will happen.
For now I am in a holding pattern, and to be honest...there are much worse places I could be.

Friday, 23 October 2020

Filthie’s Friday Nite Movies - Ruined!!!

When I was a kid this was the coolest movie going:

Good grief. The drive in where I saw this is long gone.
Who did the tune? Sammy Hagar?
At the time this super-realism in animation 
was cutting edge stuff.
I learned to drive that year. I met my soul mate.

But time moves on. John Candy is no
longer with us. The Second City wanks have all retired.
The special effects are corny and dated.

Nothing is sacred, and perhaps the trappings of
our youth shouldn’t be either.
I know the kids are mocking me, and I should 
be offended... but all I can do is laugh.

Oh gawd.
Was the original really that bad?
Yeah... maybe it was.
Maybe the Z Man is right when he says the 
best thing about the good ol’ days is
that they’re over.


Did I Hear That Right?

 I think I read somewhere that the Pope just gave the green light to homosexual marriage in the catholic faith? If so, I think they are going to regret that one. As someone that got put through the meat grinder for rejecting Globohomo and the gay agenda... I’d just like to remind those Christians that the church is not the faith.


Honest Question: Who Wouldjya Rather Have At The Controls?

These two...?
Or Captain Filthie - Crapcopter Pilot Extraordinaire, 
and RC plane pilot?

All Hail Todd


Lotta folks out there have just had their fill of politics. I gotta say I just can’t believe the shite I’m seeing in the US. I’ll just say there are people involved that should be hanging on the end of a rope. Up here in a Canada, Turdo La Doo survived a non confidence vote. We only have those things when close to one half the country thinks that you are either too corrupt or too incompetent to govern. Our libturds did an investigation on themselves and found out that there was no problem, nothing to see there. Their fart catchers in the NDP (led by a filthy pakie in a pink turban) agreed.

Sometimes all you can do is laugh and turn it off.

And stockpile beer, popcorn and ammunition...

Thursday, 22 October 2020

Worst. TV Show. EVER!


I remember it like it was yesterday. 

Bad science fiction has been around for a long, long time. I was watching this wretched show right after suffering through The Time Tunnel. Captain Crane and The Admiral were under the polar ice cap and ran into some monsters. Oh gawd - we aren't talking about those awful space aliens that Sigourny Weaver hangs out with, or the horrible Predator monsters - it was some drunks like Jack and Quatermain  dressed up in rubber suits!

"I can't believe it!" I snapped, "I'm eleven years old and I could write better than this! I ain't gonna watch this shit!!!" I bellowed. I'd forgotten that mom was home, and the old bitch came downstairs and kicked and slapped me into my room and told me I wouldn't be watching anything with the potty mouth I was running.

Once Mom was finished bitching and griping and had closed the door, pulled out a book and sighed with contentment. You can't punish a kid that can read and has an imagination.

The Guns Of WL Emery


I dunno. I've spoken to WL about his penchant for pea shooters, but
he just doesn't listen.
This afternoon I am on a production run of
45-70 ammunition: 510 grain Postell bullets on 35.5 grains of Varget.
We'll see how that goes on the range 

And... contrary to the gin sodden WL - if you
are facing genetically enhanced 4th Reich super soldiers, 
extraterrestrial battle robots, or killer apes...
you'll want to carry enough gun... like me!

Deer Season Is Going Seriously Wrong...