Filthie's Mobile Fortress Of Solitude

Filthie's Mobile Fortress Of Solitude
Where Great Intelligence Goes To Be Insulted

Wednesday, 22 June 2022

Filthie’s Cat House


Which two should the wife pick...?

One a the farmers from our church has a fresh litter of kittens they are trying to get rid of. Unlike most men, I love cats as much as dogs. I enjoy Cat Soccer and hand to hand combat, fighting for tactical superiority in the Reclusium... and I see several no-good sonsabitches in that lot that just might offer me a challenge! HAR HAR HAR!!! That little black bastid, and that orange turd gobbler look like interesting foes... 

Unfortunately Macey is in her final days and the last thing she needs is some baby f-knuckles ruining her world. Mort is an old bugger too and I think he'd be okay with them. 

My cats were legendary villains. Sinker was dumb as a post but an idiot savante. He could do several dog tricks but outside those - he was a waste of skin. He liked to lay around and get petted - and beat on his younger brother - Smokey Joe. My daughter brought him home and he was nothing but trouble. He'd pick fights with the guys, snuggle up to the ladies and entertain our daughter - but even she got tired of his bullchit sometimes. I still miss them terribly.

Maybe I should box up the lot - mail them down to Cederq and have him release them in Phil's shop? It would be a legendary prank... but also grounds for justifiable homo-cide too. Might be worth it., though? Alas! Why do you test me and tempt me, oh mighty Lord?

Damn. 

14 comments:

  1. Hang out with them for a while. The right one will pick YOU.

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    1. That is true for puppies at least. We "visit a litter", stand some distance away, and call "Here puppy, puppy, puppy!" Invariably, at least one makes a beeline for us.
      Definitely get the ginger guy (they're usually male); they're fulla piss-n-vinegar, and make great mousers. See who follows him closest.

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    2. Send them directly to Phil, I can give you his address.... I am not overly fond of cats, don't abuse them but wouldn't have in the house. I had several on the farms I had in Alabama, but they were barn cats. Growing up mom and two sisters had cats, guess who had to clean the damn friggen cat box? Cured me of cats let me tell ya!

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    3. I enjoy threatening my arch enemies with strays, Cederq. In real life I would never consider getting an animal from someone else. That would be like picking their friends or spouses. While I would undoubtedly be the best at such a thing.... folks get tetchy about that for some reason. :)

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    4. Funny, I didn't and don't see you as an "Arch Enemas", I am rather fond of you Glen... not in that way, but you are a whisper of fresh air in our overly hectic and chaotic world, even though you are a Canuck....

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  2. You're a good fella, Glen. Cats are special creatures. I know you'll see that they get good homes.
    Last night while at work, I was taking a break outside. It was around dusk and I see a momma and her three babies hunting the small hayfield (with little luck). I could tell she was exhausted. So I goes across the street to the quikie mart and score a bag of cat food and put some water out by one of the hay bales.
    Later on, I check on them, and they're all huddled together where I placed the grub and water.
    Today, as I start another 12 hour shift, I checked the spot and just a few crumbs remain. I'll wait and see if they return this evening. Hopefully, someone (good) found them. Or, maybe they've moved on. Don't know yet.
    It grieves me that some low IQ degenerate would abandon these kitties. I'd love to take them in myself but wifey has assured me that if I do, life at home would become difficult for me. And believe me, she's a patient, understanding, good soul.
    10 cats and four dogs is obviously her break point/limit:)

    Ohio Guy

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  3. Take them all to the range. Unless they'll live outside. Indoor cats and litter boxes are a health hazard.

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    1. They can be nasty. I found that if ya keep them clean and do them once a day it isn't that bad. We kept ours in the bathroom so ya just scoop and flush. That washroom is off the back door and is unofficially a kind of utility room. The dawgs drink out of the toilet, the cats crap in there... but the humans use the upstairs washrooms in our house. It isn't a 'thing' or anything... it just seems to have worked out that way...

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  4. ohio guy, any no-kill shelters near you? we are feeding a mom with 3 or 4 [well hidden] kits hoping to get them to the point of letting us take them to a shelter we have 7 so no money for more no room either

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    1. Yeah, there's no kill shelters, that's the only way. (for me) And as for litter box health hazard, I use two baby pools (located in basement) four inches deep with clumping litter. Sifted clean twice daily. There is no odor in my house whatsoever. My cats mean the world to me...and my doggos.

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  5. I also enjoy cats but do agree that indoor cat litter boxes are a toxic mess. We currently have three indoor cats (one a 16 yr old Siamese which is getting close to the end), soon to be four (little outside kitten won my wife's heart, dammit !) and I see another litter box on the horizon.

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  6. HAR HAR HAR... I can't take them... but I wish I could...

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  7. 3 would be better. Can't do better than littermates. They're always assured a friend and no pissing contests.

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