Filthie's Mobile Fortress Of Solitude

Filthie's Mobile Fortress Of Solitude
Where Great Intelligence Goes To Be Insulted

Wednesday, 13 July 2022

Humpday Introspection



Popp takes us through the top 10 big life regrets and it makes for some interesting thinking. He is exactly right about regrets. I look at mine… and most of them stemmed from issues that dragged on for a long, long time and I did nothing about them.

On being true to myself… I give myself part marks. There were times in my life when some bad actors made things tough for me and times when I made my own problems. I had to tear down the way I thought and start over from square one… but I did it. A couple times. Many would not have, and would settle for being trapped by their own failures and bad decisions. I did alright for a hare lipped retard. I worked hard and played hard in life so I have few regrets in that regard. As far as regretting not expressing myself… hmmm… I eventually always express myself but sometimes I delay … especially if someone is going to get hurt. Part marks again… sometimes speaking my mind solved things, other times it made them much, much worse. 

Staying in touch with friends? Again… no real regrets. People change, I have changed… it is what it is. Some moved on, I moved away from some… and it’s all good. 

Could I have been happier? As compared to who or what? I’ve done alright there too. I probably spend too much time on the computer but not on social media. I don’t have the time of day to feed crazies on Twatter or Bookface… I can take JewTube snd Blab though. I like writing and pestering the other wanks and stubfarts on the internet. No apologies, no regrets!

Caring more for people that cared for me? Meh… I give what I get. Sometimes we both get what we deserve in any relationship. Truth is… I like to keep my distance from people now. Everything these days is so divisive and political. If we all keep our hands above the table and don’t do anything stupid we can all get along. But so many people can’t handle that. No regrets.

I have a metric ton of regrets with my daughter. From day one we disliked each other. We learned to fake it for awhile… and I felt there was something wrong with me. What kind of father dislikes his daughter? But she had woke teachers, friends, and in-laws working on her and they surely did a number on her. Sometimes it still breaks me up… but like I said earlier, people change. Hopefully she changes into something better in time. I did what I could, I regret all of it, but if I had to do it all over again… I would have to do a lot of the same things. Can you love someone and dislike them at the same time?

Definitely I should have listened to my gut more. I listened to others that I shouldn’t have too often and it made me miserable. I eventually got on top of that, but far too late in life. I have many regrets here.

Passions? My mistake may have been trying to follow too many. But even when they went badly… I am glad I tried.

Angus sums up my position in life beautifully. The guys at church admonish us not to compare ourselves to others,  and I am can objectively do that in my mind, but it happens in my heart anyways, a little bit. But it doesn’t tear me up at all; there’s lots of guys that have done much worse than I have, through no fault of their own.

For now, I think I am exactly where I am supposed to be… and until my Maker tells me otherwise… I think I’ll stay. There are much worse places to be.



12 comments:

  1. I watched the full Jesse Stone series of tv movies last week. He says the same things over and over through the series. I kinda liked that. One quote just kept hitting me in the face so I wrote it down: If you live long enough you will have regrets. The ones that nag you the most are the ones where you knew you had a choice.

    After I found out I had a pretty strong case of ADHD and what that looks like, I realized a lot of my regrets stemmed from a weirdly wired brain that didn't work like a "normal" one did. But the ones that have haunted me are the ones where I had a choice, made the decision, and wound up with turd all over me.

    So, yeah, if you live long enough..... I figure it's part of the mourning process for realizing more of life in this world is behind you than in front of you.

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  2. Oh shyte. Jesse Stone... that's the one with Tom Selleck?

    If it's the one I am thinking of, it changed my life, sorta. The cop would sit alone at night with a bottle wrestling with the events of his life, with only a dog for company. I used to drink like that and the image of that guy stayed in my mind for a long time. I wonder how many of us are that guy right now? Or were, at one time?

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  3. "Can you love someone and dislike them at the same time?"

    Yes. It's a strange paradigm. I think we all live with it to some degree or another. It took me longer than most to understand this. My 2cents worth.

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  4. i appreciate your honesty. we're on the same page in a lot of areas.

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  5. I really enjoy your thoughts and writing, Glen. You always give me something to think about. You might have been a pastor in a different time and life.

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    1. Not by a long shot, Doug. I got to where I am the hard way just like anyone else. Preachers and pastors (the real ones, not the phonies) - are made from far better men than I.

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    2. Ha! check your email in a bit.

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  6. Filthie, how can I share something with you?

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    Replies
    1. what would you like to share, A? I can be reached at sirfrederickjames@yahoo.com...

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  7. Very well said, Glen. #metoo
    Ohio Guy:)

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  8. " All is vanity " King Solomon .

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  9. I like STXAR travelled the same path. I was a jackass just didn't know it. Mom Died right after my teens and my perspective on life changed for what is normally called the good.

    After being run over so many years I was slowly changing back. I was tired of the bullshit, (my saving grace phrase).

    Still loyal to a fault but quick to shed people who aren't. I know few loyal people, the rest are sociopaths or politicians but I repeat myself.

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