Filthie's Mobile Fortress Of Solitude

Filthie's Mobile Fortress Of Solitude
Where Great Intelligence Goes To Be Insulted

Monday, 27 February 2023

Via Flapz: Practical Dating Advice

I’ve been saying now for awhile that he needs a wife or girlfriend. 

Or… does he…? 😂👍

In similar news I was forced to give up my social experiments with inflatable life partners - lack of funding… I wonder what a holographic one would be like?

Don’t judge me!!! Marriage is just a social construct!!!😡

Poetry Corner: Ode To A Pup

 TB used to embrace his inner samurai by spouting off doggerel that resembled what was called a"haiku". It is a high classical Japanese poetry form that the tall foreheads and intellectual elite favour.

I now will elevate myself to the loftier echelons of the world's best poet laureates! Quiet, everyone! I must insist on your closest attention and silence whilst I pontificate, bloviate, and orate!



Let's go outside!

Let's go outside!

I really think we should!

Otherwise you'll pooh in my shoe

And that wouldn't be good.

Last night ya pooped in the closet

The night before, the shed

I took one sniff 

And that one whiff 

Nearly knocked me dead!

Oh my God

What's that smell

It smells like someone died

We’d better git 

Before ya shit

And get the hell outside!

HAR! There ya go! Wasn’t that beautiful?

In ya face, TB!

One More, Why Not?


When I Discovered I Needed A Motorcycle


I would have seen this when I was 5 or 6. Watching Steve jump the rows of coiled up barbed wire just struck a chord in my soul that I can still hear today. Perhaps I suddenly know why, 60 years later? My mom is responsible! “No Glen, you can’t have a gun!” “No Glen, you can’t stay out late at night!” “No Glen, you can’t smoke cigarettes!” “No Glen, you can’t set the cat on fire!” “No Glen, you can’t play with matches!”

Poor Mom. “No Glen…you can’t have a motorcycle!!!!” I remember tears on that one when it went out the window. I’ve been on motorcycles most of my life now. I do or have done all the other “dont’s” too! Of course mom was right on some of those things…but I am still glad I did them. 


Enjoy The Ride Scott!


Scott Adams is Hitler now!
What original, biting satire it is that comes from the
political left!

Well the Whypipo’s Day Of Hate passed without incident on Saturday, thankfully. Thanks to the brave work done by faggots, 400 lb. trannies with green hair, the crackheads and street people of ANTIFA…and of course the usual jewish goblins…the nazis fearfully huddled in their bunkers, the panzer tanks stayed in their garages…and the American concentration camps were empty! It was just another day where maybe a few random porch monkeys attacked some white female SS officers, and some geriatric whites got gooned with bricks in the odd Knockout Game. I think it was the ADL and some other community organizers that warned us that the old Great American Cultural Melting Pot is now at a full boil…and peace loving vibrants, jews and SJWs had better be ever vigilant and keep one hand on their sidearms.

Who woulda seen that coming!?!? HAR HAR HAR!  Ehhhhhhh….HAR HAR HAR! I’m sure Scott will be just fine. Retirement from the lamestream is sometimes painful but cleansing. He has enough money to live in an affluent white retirement community. In another 15 minutes, nobody will remember his name.

Fact is… if I were him? I’d take Dilbert underground and have him star in offensive cartoons laden with rude jokes and offensive race content. I’d poast them on forbidden dark websites like Niggermania or Stormfront and then claim they were deep fakes when the three letter police agencies see them and flip out. 

Embrace obscurity, Scott - and have fun!

Sunday, 26 February 2023


I hear hat ol’ Peanut Boy is dying in

Won’t be sorry to see him go. Hopefully we learn
to govern ourselves with better men
in the distant future…


Chinese Pizza…?


A Sunday Ramble: No

All my dawgs with the exception of the last one were pound puppies. There’s tons of good dogs in the shelters that will do ya fine. There’s also a few heart breakers in there with health and behaviour problems. Life is a crap shoot. There are advantages to dealing with registered breeders - they generally take more pains to ensure their pups are healthy and that their shots and medicines are up to date. Theres a stiff premium to be paid for that too. There’s nothing wrong with wanting a specific breed either.

My dogs are where I find them. Wouldn’t have it any other way either.

This senior delinquent took out my attack
monkey with the smell from his feet!
The stench knocked her right out!

The parents love her.

I got in supreme chit with my parents. Hannah is wearing Macey’s old spikey training collar. It’s a nasty variant of the choker with prongs that will dig in and hurt if the pooch pulls. The monster is up to 20 pounds now…and I can’t be playing tug of war on glare ice. The little girl figured it right out and was almost instantly polite. She’ll be walking like a civilized lady in two weeks. Of course Mom and Dad see it as needlessly cruel. For her part…the pup seems to actually like it…it looks just like Mort’s and she worships him. She has her own Big Girl collar now. 😂

Life is good here…have yourselves a great Sunday.

Let’s Get This Sunday Started Off Right!


Let’s try and keep the noise level down folks. I need the peace and quiet so that I can focus on my business and my reading… your cooperation is sincerely appreciated.


Saturday, 25 February 2023

Musical Time Machine


I was down in the Reclusium trying to cut off my fingers with some leatherwork. I've had a sweet little Kershaw pocket knife for decades and never made a sheath for it. I cut out the pieces while an electroswing playlist quietly tinkled away on the corner of the work bench when this silly little tune came on. 

I remembered my daughter as a tyke, watching Inspector Gadget. It was a fun little cartoon for kids starring a moronic bionic police detective and his brilliant niece and plucky dawg that were taxed to the limit keeping their retarded uncle from killing himself or blowing up the world or what have you.

The Gadget character was voiced by none other than Don Adams - many of you old stubfarts may recognize him as Agent 86 from Get Smart.

He was the perfect guy for the role.
Don Adams was a gift from God to two generations of kids - 
big AND small.

Where did those lazy weekend mornings go, when we were still a family? It's funny, the kind of stuff that triggers fond memories out of nowhere. I just stood there, listening to the happy jingle and remembering people long gone but still occasionally missed - and absently cut off three fingers and one gonad. Enjoy it all while can folks…it may not always be there…

I hope YOU at least - are getting something done. Have a great Saturday, and thanks for stopping by.




Gills On Fire


It’s National Hate Day Everyone!!!

 If ya listen to the usual suspects, our nations are both crawling with secret nazis just itching to reignite the holocaust and kick off the fourth reich.  Other than a few obvious kooks I’ve never seen one. But the shitlibs see them everywhere. Up here in Canada we used to have this prominent pasty faced liberal flimp named Warren Kinsella. Apparently this brave Nazi hunter uncovered a Nazi hive at the local hockey arena. They’d scrawled a swastika in one of the stalls in the boys bathroom!!! The same authorities are warning us that today all the murderers, genocidal maniacs and slave owners are going to come out of the closet and wreak havoc!!!!

I never got the memo either. My white bedsheet and cone head hood are in at the dry cleaners! I guess y’all will have to go out and burn crosses, lynch noggers and make soap out of the joos without me.

Blade Fetish: A Matter Of Practicality


Y’know… I love the big fighters, especially the artisanal ones where they go into exotic materials and designs. But in the real world… I am not convinced of the need for them. In fact, their size makes them an utter PITA to carry. Would you buy one?

There definitely is a time and a place for these. If you are going to have to fight or process firewood or do heavy jobs in uncertain locales…yeah, these make a certain kind of sense. I used to carry one in my plunder for years when I didn’t have to worry about weight. The bushcrafter can benefit with these too; he’s going to be building shelters and elaborate camps for extended stays in primitive conditions. But he’s probly going to have a small axe and a folding bucksaw too.

I can tell ya right now though…the casual hiker and hunter will likely never actually need one. I never did at any rate. This one is technically a bayonet - meaning it is meant to attach to a rifle. It’s an interesting evolution actually. Private McKenzie over on British Muzzleloaders shoots all kinds of antique military rifles where the bayonets are actually short swords. In one episode he was running period authentic musketry drills and if he had to carry the thing on his belt he was constantly tripping over it.

In the real world, for what I do…the pocket knives and axes are the way to go… but I loves me the big blades. 

Feline Fight Club: The Heptagon

Many enter… only one may leave…



Saturday Home Invasion

Poor Mort had his crate invaded by
this little black baboon!

He is truly a beautiful soul. He takes all
The crap the little one doles out
like a champ…


Friday, 24 February 2023

Another Blog Bleg


I will also need to borrow money for vulcanized rubber cement...

No cheques or crypto please.

Another Case Of Incompetent ManageMINT

Once again the Thunderbox management team has soiled itself! You’d think a fwench pipe polisher of some sort were running this joint sometimes, or perhaps a harelipped retard! 😡

On behalf of the management team, I’d like to extend a formal apology to the Extexanwannabe. He’s only linked on half the innernet and you’d think he’d be linked here too.

This oversight will be rectumfied poast-haste, and the tards responsible will be flogged shortly. 

Up on the blog roll he goes.

Feathered Florida Fattie Fight Club



I dunno whether to love Aesop for his comedy or hate him for it! The guy’s a product of clownworld. The way I understand it is that during WW1…women would shame people opposed to the war and those that refused to fight as cowards. Supposedly they handed out white feathers as a symbol of craven character. I am not surprised to see our Stubfart Californian Karen trying to revive the practice.

Fact is… I’d take one of those feathers too, were it not for the fact that he’d have to pluck it off his own corn spackled ass to give it to me, HAR HAR HAR!!!


Fact is, I just can’t get worked up about vibrants beating up their teachers. I hate public school teachers on general principles. They were bad when I was a kid but they’re much worse now. Their only interest in kids is as a pawn in union wage negotiations. They don’t give a shit if the kids learn anything or not. They are the ones that insist on drilling multiculturalism, homosexuality, and Marxism into the kids. Under their instruction, kids know all about why Johnny has three mommies, or Donald Trump is the same as Adolf Hitler, or why Shirley is a man, and why toddlers should have a working knowledge about homosexual sex. Most of them could care less if your kid can read or handle basic numeracy. If a teacher actually cares about the kids and tries to educate them in the public system… they get fired or run off. I grew up hating those maggots, we had a few in the family and they are mostly the same. Real teachers go to private schools in Canada.

FEED that bitch, Shitavius!!!

Then of course there’s the fact that if somebody were to intervene…they’d get the same treatment that others have gotten while trying to restrain these pavement apes. Derek Chauvin is in jail, accused of murder because he restrained George Floyd according to police procedures and methods. Five will get you ten that that gal cheered when Chauvin got charged too. All that…while toxicology reports showed that George Floyd died because he had 4 times the lethal limit of fentanyl in his system.  

Hopefully more public educators get a taste of their real world liberal idealism as this one did. They most assuredly deserve it. 


Friday Flither Flather, Flummery & Assorted Rude Jokes


Thursday, 23 February 2023

Filthie Nerds Out

 I generally hate sci-fi without even seeing any of it. To listen to the queers, Poindexters and propeller heads talking about Star Wars or Star Trek makes me want to go scuttling back under my rock in Geek Forest. But if the subject were to come up, and I were to actually take part in the discussion…I’d tell the Star Warz nerds and the Trekkies to both get stuffed! The greatest sci-fi show was BSG!

The first one was unequivocally a kids’ show. If I recall it came out right after Star Wars and the original series had Lorne Greene in it. I was still a kid so I enjoyed most of it. The Ceylons ran around in rubber boots and hockey pads painted silver, and the special effects were first rate for their day. It was excellent space opera for a different age.

For the second version in the early 2000’s they took the series away from the little kids and gave it to the big ones. The plots were a little more grown up, the characters were given a little more complexity and the special effects were used to bolster the plot, not the other way around. I laughed like hell when the original actor that played Apollo … showed up as a nasty villain in the remake. Seeing him on the show was like seeing Lorne Greene in the original - it evoked much loved notes of nostalgia.

The role of Gaius Baltar changed too…he went from a flat cut-out villain to a magnificently played antagonist in the sequel. One never really knew whether to hate him or feel sorry for him.

Funny, how the thing just seemed to grow along with me. I’d heard some noise that a third rendition was in the works, but it fell apart because of Covid. It’s probly for the best. The older I get, the harder I find it to fall under the story teller’s spell. And today’s cinematographers, artists and writers? Gah…those guys ruin pretty much everything they put their hand to. 

But back in the day…some truly ridiculous fun could be had.